Scarleteen

Hello,

to understand your articles even better I would like to know how you define intercourse.

wikipedia says:
Sexual intercourse (or coitus or copulation) is principally the insertion and thrusting of the penis, usually when erect, into the vagina for sexual pleasure, reproduction, or both.[3] This is also known as vaginal intercourse or vaginal sex.[2][4] Other forms of penetrative sexual intercourse include anal sex (penetration of the anus by the penis), oral sex (penetration of the mouth by the penis or oral penetration of the female genitalia), fingering (sexual penetration by the fingers), and penetration by use of a dildo (especially a strap-on dildo).

So if you use the word "intercourse" alone without any adjectives like "genital" or "vaginal" do you many any kind of intercourse (fingering, oral etc.) or do you mean actual penetration of a penis inside a vagina ?

The terminology used here is very confusing sometimes, also many terms are not listed in the glossary. Other web pages use these terms differently, too.

This site has become my main source for questions around sex so I don't want any misunderstandigs to happen.

For example the word intercourse is used here: "Scenarios like these are NOT how pregnancy happens: Contact with pre-ejaculate, but NOT during intercourse or direct genital-to-genital contact"

Thanks for your reply!

*edit* This is not a pregnancy scare related question. My gf now uses pregnancy tests whenever we would have any doubts.

Hi Henn,

If you hover over words underlined in green in our articles you'll see the definitions we use. For example, we define intercourse as "When people interlock their genitals and move together as feels good to them for the purpose of sexual stimulation and/or
reproduction."

When we are referring to specific kinds of intercourse, such as anal or vaginal intercourse we will say that.

Hi, thanks for the reply.

Is there a special meaning to the word interlock or is that the same as penetration?

Greetings

Yes, we basically use "interlocking" in place of "penetration" because we like the connotations of that word better.

Ok, and the opposite of intercourse is manual Sex? So manual Sex is not intercourse.

When we say "intercourse" here and we are talking about pregnancy, we are talking about sex where two sets of genitals are interlocking in some way. And as Siân said, when we are referring to specific kinds of intercourse, such as anal or vaginal intercourse, we will say that clearly.

However, when we are talking about sex and pleasure, sometimes we include manual sex when we're talking about intercourse, as that is one way that people who engage in manual sex sometimes describe it. But again, we are generally quite specific when we talk about kinds of sex.

Well, somehow this is utterly confusing. Let's take the "contact with pre ejaculate but not during intercourse" text... You say that the meaning of intercourse varies, so manual Sex might be included or not. However this is a massive difference. Would she get pregnant if pre ejaculate gets in her eye, I'm sure not. Would somebody get pregnant if pre ejaculate is deep inside the vagina from vaginal intercourse, yes maybe.

So the obvious question is what kind of contact is considered safe here.

Henn, I feel like something here is being needlessly complicated that is really only semantic, and not a barrier to the information you are seeking. I also feel that the specific barrier you're creating isn't one in our information: when we are talking about what does and doesn't pose pregnancy risks in our content, we are really very clear about what kind of contact we mean.

Is what you want to know what sexual activities pose pregnancy risks?

If so, here is the piece here that I believe you have already been linked to, but in case not, which very clearly and simply lists all sexual activities and which pose pregnancy risks (and at what level): Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That?

I read everything again carefully and I think I understood it. However your guide has some terminology that I did not find to be clear. But the other one (you're not pregnant why do you think that?) clarifies these things. I find some terminology just too hard to understand. Maybe simpler words would help sometimes... Intercourse... Interlocked... Manual Sex...

We do our very best to be clear and specific and to do so in a way that works with the context any of this is within and what audience it's meant for (which is often a diverse one, including with gender identity and orientation, which can make use of many of these terms trickier than the more limited populations they were often meant to serve).

I'm sorry if that doesn't always meet the mark for you or anyone else, but honestly, that's just going to be how it is sometimes. Human sexuality is pretty literally as diverse as human beings, so the idea there are very simple, universal terms that will work for everyone is just very flawed from the front. There's no perfect right way that's going to result in a complete understanding or grasp of any of this stuff for everyone -- that's billions of people, all from a massively diverse bunch of cultures and sexualities and communities -- all the time. If there were, being a sex educator would be a much easier job than it is. I assure you, we are already doing the best we can every day to use terms and language in ways that can work for as many people as possible, and we'll keep doing that.

I'm going to close this thread for now, because I think it's been extended past its conclusion at this point.