Therapy Has Been Opening Some Old Wounds

Questions and discussion about sexual or other abuse or assault, and support and help for survivors.
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This area of the boards is expressly for support and help for those who are currently in or have survived abuse or assault. It is also for those seeking information or discussion about abuse or assault. Please make every effort in this space to be supportive and sensitive. Posts in this area may or do describe abuse or assault explicitly.

This area of the boards is also not an area where those who are themselves abusing anyone or who have abused or assaulted someone may post about doing that or seek support. We are not qualified to provide that kind of help, and that also would make a space like this feel profoundly unsafe for those who are being or who have been abused. If you have both been abused and are abusing, we can only discuss harm done to you: we cannot discuss you yourself doing harm to others. If you are someone engaging in abuse who would like help, you can start by seeking out a mental healthcare provider.
whitelucent
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Therapy Has Been Opening Some Old Wounds

Unread post by whitelucent »

I'm a rape and sexual abuse survivor. It hurts me every day in ways I don't even realize half the time. I can't get super close to people. Physical contact makes me feel sick, and don't even get me started on sex. I have a hard time showing my emotions too. I just never want to show my whole self to anyone again. I still consider myself kind and friendly to my friends and family, and I'm always willing to help them through things, but I can't connect to them on the same level their other loved ones can, and I feel jealous, but I can't really change how guarded I am. I was raped by a stranger when I was 8, so even walking around in broad daylight triggers some paranoia. I feel so closed in, but when I try to change it, it just makes things worse. I just get hurt again. How can I learn to be content with my good, although distant and somewhat artificial relationships with people in my life? It hurts to be so alone, but I can't seem to train my brain to fully trust again.
Sam W
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Re: Therapy Has Been Opening Some Old Wounds

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi whitelucent,

Is the therapist you're seeing someone who specializes in working with survivors? I ask because some of what you're looking to do is going to be best accomplished in therapy, but you'll need someone who understands how to work with the trauma that comes from a sexual assault. And when you say your attempts to change things seem to make the situation worse, would it be possible to give me an example?

As an aside, would you be alright with me condensing this thread and your other thread? It seems like the issues in them are interlinked, so it would be helpful for us to put them together into one thread.
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