Let me just start by saying I'm a Christian, although my belief of the religion strays from the stereotype that god hates 'sexual immorality' (I wont bore you with the details as to I believe this as this isn't the point.), my parents on the other hand don't share the same views as me.
I don't really know what my sexuality is i just find people attractive. I hate that I can't be the child my parents want me to be. I want my parents to be proud of me but how can they, when I find both sex's attractive. I want them to love me the same way they always have and not have resentment towards me or my partner.
I want to have kids with my own and my partners genes in them but If I like another dude how can we do that (with current science), I hate the fact that this isn't possible and without a target to direct it at I hate myself for it; as not being able to be born the opposite of sex of my potential partner to have child (of both our genes) with them kills me inside, I hate myself for it.
I just want to ask should I just discard my feelings for the same sex to save my self from potential heart ache or should I follow where my heart leads me even if it brings my self hate and loathing?
(I'm sorry If this was a depressing topic and if there is poor grammar and punctuation.)