Figuring Out The Cup

Questions and discussion about contraception, safer sex, STIs, sexual healthcare and other sexual health issues.
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

Hey again,

Finally bought myself a MeLuna and it arrived just before my period started, which was awesome! So far, I haven't had any effects that might be allergic reactions, so I guess TPE is an okay material for me! Really glad I didn't switch from pads straight to the cup too, as using discs really helped prepare me for insertion.

Unfortunately, my first time trying the cup did not go very well. It was not only painful, but I believe it didn't pop up from it's fold. Good thing I wore a pad as well that night! I first used the punchdown fold because of the 3 most common/popular that I remembered, it was the one with the smallest insertion point. The hurt, came from the bottom/widest part where the fold ended up in a sharp point. The 2nd time I tried putting the cup in, I really struggled, having to take it out and try insertion again because I couldn't get it to pop up or sit comfortably. I tried twisting the cup around, it wouldn't move. For some reason, my muscles and especially pelvic bone locked it into a crescent moon sort of shape lol. I had to literally poke and prod the cup to force it to pop up. I was also worried that I may have scratched my vaginal walls with that sharp point of the fold as I started bleeding blood that didn't look like uterus lining. For one, it was a brighter shade of red and two, it was very thin watery... blood... I continued struggling the 3rd time I put it in, this time, trying to insert with the fold facing the back. Oof, did that hurt! D:

After that 3rd time, I decided to look up the other less popular folding methods to see if I could find one without sharp anything. The origami fold turned out to be the best. It still produced a sharp point, but it was a point that I could push in so that I was left with a more tulip like shape with rounded edges. Insertion was a LOT smoother once I tried this fold, it even popped up easier, though I still had to help it along. Which is a relief, until an hour ago, when I decided to explore even more to see why the cup stayed a crescent moon shape once it popped up. I started finding and pulling out weird stringy bits of blood that looked and felt like very thick skin which didn't break when pulled apart until force is applied... Kinda reminded me of the amniotic sac that I've seen animals pull off their babies!

Is that normal uterus lining or my vagina walls are sloughing off from the torture it received yesterday? If the latter, I'm gonna have to schedule an emergency appointment with my GYN!
ameliap
not a newbie
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Jul 01, 2017 5:00 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm pretty funny
Primary language: English
Pronouns: She/Her
Sexual identity: Pan-sexual
Location: Seattle

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by ameliap »

Hi! Another Cup User Here!

I'm sorry you hurt yourself :( that sucks, especially on your period. I use a Diva Cup and have had some similar problems. I'm not sure about the MeLuna, but the Diva Cup is made from quite a soft plastic, so I've never experienced scratching or a sharp point. However, getting mine in can be difficult. What works best for me is "pushing" my inner muscles, like you would when delivering a baby, then pushing the cup in against that pressure, that way it goes deeper and I can't feel it digging into me as much. Generally, my cup stays in the "crescent moon" shape until I move around for a bit, but my instruction say that to unfold it relax and turn the cup 360 degrees when it is in. You might just need to relax? If you're nervous it might be making your muscles subconsciously clench. Maybe try it when you're not on your period to try and experiment without the added stress and discomfort of being on your period. I hope you can figure it out without any more pain! Also, I sometimes get thin membranes in my blood when I'm on my period, but never anything thick. I am not a doctor so I can't tell you one way or another, but if you are worried I really recommend going to your GYN, especially if this is not normal for you.
If you're not outraged, you're not paying attention.
~Author Unknown
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi theconfusedone,

Ouch, that sounds like an unpleasant introduction to your menstrual cup. When you try inserting it, what position are you generally in (sitting, standing, etc)?
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

Ameliap: The Diva cup uses silicone, which is actually very similar in texture to TPE, so there wouldn't be much of a difference. Perhaps I held the fold too tightly to cause that sharp point! Either way, the punchdown is definitely not for me! As for being nervous, I started myself off with using discs before getting a cup, so I was already quite confident in inserting anything. I've always been tight though, and bearing down while insertion also caused a bit of pain. With the origami fold, I managed to reduce the pain to just discomfort or very little pain, but I think maybe I'm just very very sensitive at the opening. I mean, sometimes, even a finger hurt! And yes, I use big globs of lube!

Sam: Squatting, as that is the position I'm most comfortable in besides laying on my back, which isn't a good idea in the bathroom... especially when my flow is seemingly non-stop and heavy...
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Sam W »

Got it. One position you might find helpful, if awkward at first, is to insert the cup while standing with your leg up on something like the rim of the bathtub or the toilet seat. Squatting often feels like the natural position for cup insertion, and it does work for some people, but in my experience of using the cup and talking with other folks who use it the leg-up position is pretty effective at cutting down on the discomfort of insertion.
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

Oh, interesting. I'll try that. I also tried sitting yesterday, it started hurting before the cup even got close to going in lol. So the strings of skin I kept finding is normal uterus lining and I don't have to worry? What causes it to come out like that anyway? It was weird, creepy and scary!
Mo
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 2287
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:57 pm
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm always wearing seriously fancy nail polish.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: he/him, they/them
Sexual identity: queer/bisexual

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Mo »

It's hard to say for sure since we can't see what you're talking about, but I'm thinking this is probably just the normal sort of uterus lining/tissue that you shed during menstruation. Even a sharp edge of a menstrual cup isn't likely to cause a serious injury of the sort that would scrape a bunch of skin off.
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

That's relieving to know. Even if such an injury was to occur, it would usually mean a LOT of pain that would continue throughout the day, right? That's what I kept telling myself to avoid a full blown panic anyway!

Btw, is it possible to "feel" when the cup is full before it starts overflowing and leaking?
Mo
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 2287
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:57 pm
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm always wearing seriously fancy nail polish.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: he/him, they/them
Sexual identity: queer/bisexual

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Mo »

Oh yeah, I can only imagine it would be a pain you'd notice pretty clearly! I really don't think you have to worry here. :)

Someone with more recent cup experience might have a secret to share here, but in my experience there was no way I could tell when mine was full or not. I would empty it every 4-6 hours to start, but as I got used to it and how much flow I generally had, I was able to leave it in longer and feel pretty confident about it.
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

I ask because on my heaviest day, within 2 hours, I felt uncomfortable and sort of... "heavy". With the discs, I found that I could leave it in for about 4 hours before I had to empty them. So when I tried the same with the cup, I found that 4 hours was way too long because I kept leaking and when I took the cup out, it was like, almost to the brim... I didn't have time to try 3 hours, because I wanted to make sure that it wasn't just because I was new to the cup and perhaps it didn't manage to pop up and seal correctly. By the time I made sure it was sealed properly, it was time to sleep and the next day was lightening up lol.

At first I thought maybe I bought a size too large because of the crescent moon shape I kept getting, which was what made me think maybe it wasn't sealing properly. But I bought the medium BECAUSE of my heavy flow and if I have to keep emptying it every 2-3 hours, I'm not sure how that's gonna be helpful when I need to go out during this heavy day... Imagine going to the Renaissance fest and having to rush to gross "privies" that's like a couple blocks outside the festival every 2 hours... Omg, I am SO glad my period started AFTER we were done with the festival!
>.<

It's making me wonder if I should buy a sea sponge and combine sponge with cup on my heaviest day...
Jacob
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 1056
Joined: Tue Jul 29, 2014 3:33 am
Age: 35
Primary language: English
Pronouns: They
Location: Leeds UK

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Jacob »

It sounds like you're working out what works for you... with a bit of trial and error which seems your best bet so I'm not sure what I can advise.

But it does sound like 'Renaissance' fest could do with improving their facilities! Could they do with recieving a strongly worded email?
"In between two tall mountains there's a place they call lonesome.
Don't see why they call it lonesome.
I'm never lonesome when I go there." Connie Converse - Talkin' Like You
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

Hah, that would be pretty awesome, but the festival was made to follow the "Renaissance" era, hence why I said "privies" because that was literally what they called it. I don't think the term "toilet" existed back then. It was my first time going to one, so my first impression is pretty much manga/anime convention in the middle of nowhere (forests), complete with muddy grounds, insects and giant turkey legs for food. There were quite a few Game of Thrones cosplayers! We had to walk a long winding path from the parking lot to the entrance of the fest, with the "privies" located at the beginning of said path!

But yeah, that was just an extreme example of which I had experience with most recently. I wouldn't want to be shopping for groceries and have to rush to the restrooms every 2-3 hours either. That kinda limits me in the same way using pads alone was incapacitating me, tbh. I mean, one of the main reasons I wanted to switch to a cup was so that I didn't have to feel that "waterfall" feeling and the idea of being able to keep the cup in for longer periods of time was very attractive. Now I find that it barely lasts 3 hours? XD
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9533
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 53
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Heather »

If you're familiar with the cup, you may have already tried this, but good, washable pads tend to do a really good job with heavy flow. Better, I'd say, that anything you can insert. And if you have a place you can put a plastic baggie, they can be as easy to use out and about as anything else.

You can even get some washable pads or menstrual undergarments that allow you to add an extra layer or liner to an existing pad, so you can just swipe that one away when it gets more wet than you'd like and switch it out. To give you an example, I'm talking about something like this: https://lunapads.com/maxi-pad

You may already have decided you just don't want to do pads, but in case you haven't, I wanted to make sure to pipe up. A lot of people just don't seem to think about pads as an option once tampons or cups are available, or assume that tampons or cups are always a superior choice, when in some ways, they might not be. :)
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

I have not tried washable pads. It's not that I think cups are a superior choice, it's more about that whole "waterfall" feel that I'm thoroughly fed up with XD I have actually not stopped using pads and don't intend to completely stop, especially since a full, uninterrupted 8 hour sleep on my heaviest day is not possible with just the cup (or disc). All my period life (since 10yo), I have dreaded feeling that huge gush because back when I first started having them, it ALWAYS meant leakage and staining of clothes. It got to the point where I just developed paranoia and started packing extra everything as if I'm camping, going overseas or have a very messy baby (adult diaper bag, anyone?). I started forcing myself and my schedule to sit and stay seated on the same spot almost 24/7. When I got up, it's to rush to the restroom before the "waterfall" happened and once I'm done (an hour later) cleaning up, I go back to sitting... I was always a couch potato, but one week every month, I might have been better off buying a wheelchair, as least I would've been able to get around and do things!

I have for YEARS been wishing I could reduce my flow somehow, it was only when I started having bad anemic side effects, like not being able to breathe, that my parents finally agreed to let me see a GYN and get prescribed for ocp. Until now, my mum is not happy that I had to alter my hormones... And I've not taken ocp for a few months now!

I think stopping ocp and having my flow go back to being heavy (though surprisingly, it's not as bad as it was before taking ocp. Used to be, my heavy days were 3 days instead of just 1 heavy day now) is bringing back all those negative emotions. And now, I actually HAVE ways of preventing that "waterfall" feelings without forced hormone changes... I guess I'm disappointed that it may be more hassle than incapacitating myself as I did before. I mean, I'm LOVING my cup... just not on that one heavy day... Washable pads are nice in that they're reusable but I'm not sure I'd enjoy having to scrub blood stains out of them, after storing them in plastic bags that're put in said adult diaper bag, you know?
Karyn
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 1407
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 3:00 pm
Age: 39
Awesomeness Quotient: I collect condoms.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Canada

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Karyn »

For what it's worth, in my experience, washable pads don't really require scrubbing. If you need to change a pad or liner during the day, you tuck the used one in a plastic bag, and chuck it in a bucket with a bit of detergent when you get home, until the next time you do laundry, when you just throw them in the wash with everything else. Sure, they get stained over time, but so does underwear, and the darker coloured ones don't really show stains if you're concerned about that. Since you're using pads as a backup anyways, washable ones or menstrual undergarments might be worth a try.

That said, if your flow is still heavy enough on that one day that cleaning up after a leak takes an hour (!!!) and you're filling the cup within an hour, that's definitely something to check in with your gyn about. I know you mentioned a couple of months ago that you were planning on seeing a new gyn, but have you actually had an appointment yet? If so, how did that go?
"Where there is power, there is resistance." -Michel Foucault
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

I tend to do laundry every 2 weeks... wouldn't soaking them for 2 weeks be a bad idea? XD

I have been to a new GYN, yes. Only had one appointment with her so far. We didn't really discuss my flow being heavy as I was still on ocp when I saw her. That was when we decided I should stop, to see if things improve (as there is a worry that blood clots might be the cause of my joint pains). I did mention to her that I had intended on eventually switching to a cup and hoping that would help with my heavy flow. Other than that, we also discussed my problem with lubes burning me, but I didn't really get anywhere with that. She did my pap smear and 2 STI checks, chlamydia and gonorrhea, both negative. Also discussed other contraceptive options, of course. I should probably make another appointment with her, but I've kinda been busy adjusting to my new life, as well as having doc appointments almost every month it feels like. Infact, I gotta go see a rheumatologist on Wednesday as my husband's family doc can't find anything wrong with my joints besides a very high ANA (type of antibody). My mum had stupidly heavy flows all HER period life, so we've always thought that was just... normal... you know, us, our genes... something...

Basically, the appointment with my new GYN went well, I just didn't really get many answers out of it probably due to the fact that I'm a new patient and it was only 1 appointment.

(Oh, and it used to take an hour to clean up because it seemingly never stopped. It was like a tomato juice bottling factory... never ending gushes every 10 seconds! Now, it's not as bad though I still take 30 mins to clean up... Mostly trying to learn putting the discs/cup in correctly hah... Can't rush those or it'll hurt!)
Karyn
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 1407
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 3:00 pm
Age: 39
Awesomeness Quotient: I collect condoms.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Canada

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Karyn »

Yeah I wouldn't suggest soaking them for 2 weeks...handwashing is another option, but obviously only if you want to look into washable pads! It's your choice, whatever you feel works best for you.

It's great you've been able to connect with a new gyn who seems more helpful than your last one. One appointment isn't really enough to get any answers though, as you've noted, so making a follow up appointment would definitely be a good idea. It's definitely no fun to feel like you're always traipsing to one medical appointment or another, especially when you're still getting settled in a new place, but it is worth it. It would also be a good idea to connect your gyn and the rheumatologist you're seeing, particularly if there's a chance that something gynecological might be contributing to your other pain. You can just mention to whichever one you see first that you're also seeing another doctor for x,y,z issues and that you'd appreciate them communicating with each other. Most doctors are pretty happy to do that, especially when there's a chance that they're both investigating different aspects of the same thing.
"Where there is power, there is resistance." -Michel Foucault
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

All 3 doctors are connected through a medical system that they have going on here, so all 3 have access to the same information and findings from each doctor... kinda neat! And so much easier, but yes, I will be mentioning the possibility of blood clots to the rheumatologist. I'm only going to see him because my mum had RA before and I do have the antibodies for SOMETHING, so...

Back to the cup though: is it possible to combine sponge with cup and would that perhaps allow me to last longer between trips to the restroom? Has anyone ever done that before?
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Sam W »

I wouldn't recommend combining the cup and a sponge, since the odds of them both fitting comfortably while interacting with each other are really, really low.
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

Hmm... Maybe I should ask MeLuna to make a "long" version lol. They already have the "shorty" versions!
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

So just my luck, my period starts just as I go on a road trip. And just before it started, I was told that the hotel we're staying at has a public hot tub. Excited, I packed my swim suit, even if it was in the middle of winter.

I've never tried swimming or soaking in water during my period let alone while wearing the cup. I know there has been advertisements stating that you can go swimming with tampons and I assume it's the same with cups. But is it sanitary? After using the cup for a few months now, I know that there will always be residue blood left outside the cup. Will that leak out into the pool?

Since it's a public hot tub, I'm not sure I want to get in, and then watch people panic and scream when they see blood...
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9533
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 53
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by Heather »

Get in! It will work just like (better, actually) a tampon in this regard. :)
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
TheConfusedOne
not a newbie
Posts: 93
Joined: Mon May 11, 2015 9:23 am
Age: 30
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm A Rider. Nuff Said.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Bi-Curious
Location: Michigan, US

Re: Figuring Out The Cup

Unread post by TheConfusedOne »

I've never used a tampon before, so I wouldn't really know xD

I guess I'll just try... And hope I don't get chased out because of any naughty escaping bit of uterus lining!
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic