I just read a bunch of questionable information on birth control and I need to know if any of it is actually true

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Jon White
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I just read a bunch of questionable information on birth control and I need to know if any of it is actually true

Unread postby Jon White » Tue Apr 09, 2019 2:08 pm

My girlfriend went on birth control a little while ago and, as is expected, is moody. Which I can deal with, I knew it was coming. It's been like a month and I got sorta confused so I did some light googling, and I found out all of this stuff about birth control, and how it can make you less attracted to your partner. I know she's not gonna leave me because of it but I'm still really stressed about it because, you know I really don't want her to leave me. Will she be this upset as long as she's on the pill? Or will the hormones balance in such a way that she starts acting, I don't want to say normal but normal? I just really love her and i'm really freaking out.

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Re: I just read a bunch of questionable information on birth control and I need to know if any of it is actually true

Unread postby Mo » Tue Apr 09, 2019 2:39 pm

This information you found online certainly does sound questionable, I agree! Some people can find that hormonal birth control impacts their mood, but not everyone does, and there's no direct relation between birth control and specifically losing interest in a partner. And for people who do notice changes in mood from their birth control method, that might even out in a few months and it might not.
What you could do is check in with her about her experiences using birth control so far: how is she doing, overall? Has she noticed any sort of change in her mood, or other health issues? If there are specific things you're worried about you can bring them up too but it might be helpful for her to have you open up with some sympathy and general questions about her experience with this. It can be a big adjustment to take hormonal birth control, and it's harder for some folks than others.

Jon White
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Re: I just read a bunch of questionable information on birth control and I need to know if any of it is actually true

Unread postby Jon White » Sat Apr 13, 2019 7:23 am

Mo wrote:This information you found online certainly does sound questionable, I agree! Some people can find that hormonal birth control impacts their mood, but not everyone does, and there's no direct relation between birth control and specifically losing interest in a partner. And for people who do notice changes in mood from their birth control method, that might even out in a few months and it might not.
What you could do is check in with her about her experiences using birth control so far: how is she doing, overall? Has she noticed any sort of change in her mood, or other health issues? If there are specific things you're worried about you can bring them up too but it might be helpful for her to have you open up with some sympathy and general questions about her experience with this. It can be a big adjustment to take hormonal birth control, and it's harder for some folks than others.

Thank you, I know it shouldn't bother me so much, the medication changes your chemistry and that'll change your brain a bit. I'm trying to be as supportive as possible and that mostly entails just listening to her and getting punched in the shoulder just, so many times. I think what's really bothering me is that since she started, the physical part of our relationship is just gone, obviously that's not the only thing I care about, I just kind of miss it, and it just stopped like, overnight. We don't even kiss anymore, and again, it's fine, but I do miss it, and I don't know how to bring it up to her without sounding horrible. It's bothering me more than I thought it would, and more than it probably should.

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Re: I just read a bunch of questionable information on birth control and I need to know if any of it is actually true

Unread postby Sam W » Sat Apr 13, 2019 7:40 am

Hi Jon,

It's great that you're trying to be so supportive and are listening to her (is that a playful punch on the shoulder that goes along with it, or a mad one?). I think there are ways to bring up your concerns about sex that aren't going to sound horrible. Sex can be a big part of certain relationships, and if that form of intimacy disappears and takes other forms of intimacy, like kissing, with it, it makes a lot of sense to miss it.

Someone's interest in sex can disappear for a lot of reasons, including medication, stress, or health issues, so you may want to come at this conversation from that angle. You could ask her, gently, if she's noticed the change in your sexual interactions and ask how she feels about it? Does she miss it? Is there something she's dealing with right now that she thinks may be the cause of it? Are those questions you feel like you could ask her?


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