Search found 1013 matches

by Mo
Tue Nov 06, 2018 5:31 pm
Forum: Bodies
Topic: swollen lymph node
Replies: 4
Views: 643

Re: swollen lymph node

I'm glad you have an appointment coming up! Hopefully that'll set your mind at ease. One note on your vibrator: if it's a shape you can easily fit a condom over, you might give that a try; it's good to keep it clean as well, but throwing a condom over the vibrator is a way to keep anything that migh...
by Mo
Tue Nov 06, 2018 4:30 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: When I masturbate, I feel nothing. Is that usual?
Replies: 8
Views: 222

Re: When I masturbate, I feel nothing. Is that usual?

When you masturbate, are you feeling arousal? If you aren't feeling pleasure when doing the same sorts of things that feel good to you during partnered sex, it could be that there's a lack of arousal when you're taking time to masturbate.
by Mo
Tue Nov 06, 2018 4:27 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Freaky Ideas
Replies: 4
Views: 109

Re: Freaky Ideas

I wrote an advice column recently that touches on how to talk with a partner about exploring kinks or fetishes in a relationship, you can check that out here for some thoughts on how to bring these things up with your partner. I wouldn't recommend trying to explore these things in secret; if you and...
by Mo
Mon Nov 05, 2018 5:58 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: How can I internalize the difference between types of intimacy?
Replies: 7
Views: 668

Re: How can I internalize the difference between types of intimacy?

Got it! That makes a lot of sense. I think the idea Sam had about pausing to examine your actions when you aren't sure what your motivations are is a good step. Building intimacy with other people can involve some waiting, in that it often takes some time for mutual trust and comfort to develop betw...
by Mo
Mon Nov 05, 2018 4:44 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Trying to be Friends but Failing
Replies: 6
Views: 450

Re: Trying to be Friends but Failing

That really is overstepping, for sure! Have you talked to him about that and how you felt about it afterwards? If not, do you think talking about it might be helpful?
by Mo
Mon Nov 05, 2018 4:31 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Trying to be Friends but Failing
Replies: 6
Views: 450

Re: Trying to be Friends but Failing

I can certainly understand why this situation is frustrating to you! It sounds like you've been pretty clear about what you want from this guy, but that he hasn't been on the same page (whether he says he is or not). The hard part about friendship is that there has to be some level of mutual desire ...
by Mo
Mon Nov 05, 2018 3:46 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: How can I internalize the difference between types of intimacy?
Replies: 7
Views: 668

Re: How can I internalize the difference between types of intimacy?

When it comes to thinking about intimacy in all its forms, we have a piece about intimacy and how to approach it that I think might be a helpful read. :)
by Mo
Mon Oct 29, 2018 2:58 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Like this guy, don't know what to do
Replies: 3
Views: 576

Re: Like this guy, don't know what to do

I think taking some time to get to know him better sounds like a great idea! There's really not a way to know if he'll be receptive to becoming friends or not, but I think starting out by trying to initiate some conversations with him and seeing how well you get along if you talk a bit more is a goo...
by Mo
Mon Oct 29, 2018 2:54 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sleep rape
Replies: 10
Views: 878

Re: Sleep rape

As Heather said above, while we can't say it's impossible that this happened, it's unlikely that it would without some sort of physical signs after the fact. I wish we could give you a more specific answer! What I think is important to address, though, is that you say you weren't feeling safe in you...
by Mo
Fri Oct 26, 2018 4:49 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Masturbation Addiction I think?
Replies: 15
Views: 1037

Re: Masturbation Addiction I think?

It's pretty common for therapy to not just "work" permanently; a lot of people find treating anxiety to be an ongoing process. Sometimes you learn strategies for dealing with anxiety that work well for some issues but not others, or anxiety worsens and you need to reasses how to treat it. ...
by Mo
Tue Oct 23, 2018 3:55 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Mutual Sexual Satisfaction Woes
Replies: 4
Views: 404

Re: Mutual Sexual Satisfaction Woes

Ok. In that case, when you're talking about sex, that's something to bring up with him! We actually have an article about how to talk to a partner about sex here: Be a Blabbermouth! The Whats, Whys and Hows of Talking About Sex With a Partner I think that it's going to be more helpful for you to tal...
by Mo
Tue Oct 16, 2018 3:45 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Discharge
Replies: 1
Views: 538

Re: Discharge

We can't say for sure what you're experiencing, or if it's normal for you, but there are a few reasons you might be noticing bloody discharge. You could be just about to start your period (even if it's early for you, you might just be having an earlier-than-normal period), or experiencing spotting; ...
by Mo
Tue Oct 16, 2018 2:26 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: First Time Experience/ Question
Replies: 4
Views: 693

Re: First Time Experience/ Question

Sometimes people will experience pain with intercourse, yes, although it's something that shouldn't be painful! If you do experience pain, it's good to do what you did - stop and either make some adjustments and try again, or just decide to not continue trying to have intercourse for the moment. Wer...
by Mo
Mon Oct 15, 2018 5:03 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Terrified of catching feelings for a FWB.
Replies: 7
Views: 1387

Re: Terrified of catching feelings for a FWB.

That sounds like a good sign to me! :) When you're used to one kind of relationship model, it can definitely take some time to mentally adjust to another one. I think that keeping in mind how you're feeling about the current situation and making sure to check in with your partner if things seem like...
by Mo
Mon Oct 15, 2018 4:31 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I want to have sex, but every time things escalate I get scared?
Replies: 3
Views: 735

Re: I want to have sex, but every time things escalate I get scared?

I do want to offer a different perspective on the idea that because your partner's had sex before, that it'll mean he's had "better" sex than what the two of you can have right now. What makes for good sex can be kind of hard to pin down, especially since no two people are likely to have t...
by Mo
Fri Oct 12, 2018 3:49 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual intimacy
Replies: 14
Views: 1753

Re: Sexual intimacy

Hi there Animallover, welcome to Scarleteen. If I'm understanding you correctly, it sounds like you do enjoy (at least sometimes) sex that involves clitoral stimulation, but don't enjoy or don't feel much during intercourse or other activities that involve something inside your vagina; do I have tha...
by Mo
Mon Oct 08, 2018 2:47 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual Shame and Sexual Trauma: Intimacy Issues
Replies: 29
Views: 2792

Re: Sexual Shame and Sexual Trauma: Intimacy Issues

I'm so glad we've been able to be of help, best of luck to you. :)
by Mo
Mon Oct 08, 2018 2:30 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: I think I upset someone
Replies: 3
Views: 1143

Re: I think I upset someone

When we're talking about dating and relationships, sometimes it's impossible to avoid hurting someone's feelings. It can be really tough when someone you care about is interested in you and you don't feel the same way, or don't feel like it's the right time to explore those feelings for some reason....
by Mo
Mon Oct 08, 2018 2:21 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Getting Kinky
Replies: 2
Views: 966

Re: Getting Kinky

I think BiKinksterBoy has some good thoughts above! Honestly, I think it's fine to approach this like you'd approach other kinds of sex you're interested in. There's not going to be a way to control how your partner reacts, but I think suggesting something you'd like to try in a way that isn't putti...
by Mo
Fri Oct 05, 2018 2:14 pm
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: What are you doing this weekend to take care of yourself?
Replies: 1
Views: 532

Re: What are you doing this weekend to take care of yourself?

I'm going to go to the farmers' market tomorrow morning to see if I can score a deal on an end-of-season big box of tomatoes, and if I can I want to make and can a bunch of sauce over the weekend. It's a bit of a long process but it makes me really happy to can something to enjoy later or give to fr...
by Mo
Fri Oct 05, 2018 2:10 pm
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: What is Something You're Looking Forward To?
Replies: 19
Views: 5054

Re: What is Something You're Looking Forward To?

I have two exciting trips coming up: one in a few weeks to visit my partner on the east coast and go to a sheep/fiber festival together, and one to travel to New Orleans in November to watch a roller derby tournament! I'm really looking forward to both.
by Mo
Tue Oct 02, 2018 5:12 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: I'm really not sure what to do...
Replies: 8
Views: 778

Re: I'm really not sure what to do...

I'm sorry this is so painful for you. It sounds like you've run into some people being pretty judgmental about what you are interested in sexually, and that can be really hurtful. I want to say, though, that having these thoughts about women doesn't mean, on its own, that you are a danger to women o...
by Mo
Tue Oct 02, 2018 4:37 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Sexual Shame and Sexual Trauma: Intimacy Issues
Replies: 29
Views: 2792

Re: Sexual Shame and Sexual Trauma: Intimacy Issues

I hope it's ok if I pop into this discussion with some of my thoughts. First off, I know Sam and Heather have said this above, but it's so, so important that I want to say it again: it is ok to have sexual desire. It is ok to want to be sexual with a partner, even if they aren't interested in being ...
by Mo
Mon Oct 01, 2018 4:17 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Birth control pill
Replies: 8
Views: 674

Re: Birth control pill

Some bleeding/spotting is pretty normal when taking birth control pills, and it can be more likely when you're first starting or if you switch brands. So, what you're describing here doesn't sound unusual at all! Hopefully you'll feel better on this new brand, and you'll notice that the bleeding cal...

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