Search found 5876 matches

by Heather
Mon May 20, 2019 7:03 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Is it my fault...
Replies: 2
Views: 149

Re: Is it my fault...

(I was writing this for you when Sam was, and since we didn't say exactly the same things, I'm going ahead and putting it through anyway. - H) Grace, I'm so sorry this was done to you by these people you should have been able to trust. No, this is not your fault. Rape isn't usually about people who ...
by Heather
Sun May 19, 2019 1:58 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Curiosity and "Bad" Timing
Replies: 6
Views: 1315

Re: Curiosity and "Bad" Timing

BuddyBoi: I'm super sorry to have to do this, but I'm afraid I probably won't be able to pick up with you until the week after next. I'm in the middle of an unexpected and very big move with which I have little help, and which also is very emotionally difficult, and I just don't feel like I have eno...
by Heather
Sat May 18, 2019 10:55 am
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: I thought I was making progress but current events opened old wounds
Replies: 2
Views: 262

Re: I thought I was making progress but current events opened old wounds

I'm not on the schedule today, but I wanted to be sure you got a response. I want to say some things about what you posted last night, but am not going to go too into some of the emotional pieces without first getting a sense from you about how you're feeling today, and, if you can speak to this, a ...
by Heather
Fri May 17, 2019 9:44 pm
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: I thought I was making progress but current events opened old wounds
Replies: 2
Views: 262

Re: I thought I was making progress but current events opened old wounds

Hey there, CartoonsPlural. I'm sorry that I'm seeing this just as I was making a quick last round, before I went to bed on a day when I am just worn ALL the way out, including from some of the same things you are. You deserve full attention/energy with something like this, and I'm afraid that whethe...
by Heather
Thu May 16, 2019 4:21 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: I felt terrified when I masturbated
Replies: 1
Views: 187

Re: I felt terrified when I masturbated

I'm sorry that you has this experience: it certainly sounds creepy and unpleasant. I'm not sure why you're feeling disgusted with yourself, because I don't see anything disgusting you have done here. It sounds like you simply were fantasizing in a pretty vague way, then something about how it was go...
by Heather
Thu May 16, 2019 11:19 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Is this possible? Please help
Replies: 1
Views: 163

Re: Is this possible? Please help

We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy. Please do not post this kind of question. If you are seeing this text, and your thread is loc...
by Heather
Thu May 16, 2019 7:56 am
Forum: Sex, Culture and Politics
Topic: A feelings-place amidst this wave of abortion bans
Replies: 1
Views: 239

A feelings-place amidst this wave of abortion bans

I just wanted to make sure to open something like this for anyone who wants or needs to to talk about how they are feeling as these state abortion bans are moving through government in the United States. I can't speak for anyone else, but THIS is one of the biggest reasons I couldn't stop crying aft...
by Heather
Wed May 15, 2019 10:51 am
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: Precum on fingers?
Replies: 1
Views: 254

Re: Precum on fingers?

We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy. Please do not post this kind of question. If you are seeing this text, and your thread is loc...
by Heather
Fri May 10, 2019 2:18 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Vulva
Replies: 18
Views: 788

Re: Vulva

There are a lot of options! This is one place where a ton of support groups in your general area -- some of which obviously won't likely be a good fit for you, like a divorce support group, but many of which might be a good fit -- are listed all on one place: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/group...
by Heather
Wed May 08, 2019 5:27 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Worried
Replies: 9
Views: 1371

Re: Worried

Of course. You know, it sounds to me like that guy was trying to shift all of the responsibility unto you, which is <insert your favorite swear word here>. This guy is way older than you, and clearly navigated much of this. Unless he's not very bright, he also knew when HE chose not to wear a condom...
by Heather
Wed May 08, 2019 11:12 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Vulva
Replies: 18
Views: 788

Re: Vulva

Would you like me to look in your area and see if there's anything like any kind of good general support groups? There might be, and it might be something that could be possibly great for you, if so. If you're into it, let me know -- and drop your zip code, if you don't mind (you can also always DM ...
by Heather
Wed May 08, 2019 10:27 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Emotional Abusive Relationship
Replies: 40
Views: 6640

Re: Emotional Abusive Relationship

It's really hard to make ourselves stop thinking about pretty much anything, especially things that are a big deal. It's a lot easier to redirect our thinking and manage the time we spend thinking, IMHO. Hope it works out for you!
by Heather
Tue May 07, 2019 7:44 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Emotional Abusive Relationship
Replies: 40
Views: 6640

Re: Emotional Abusive Relationship

Something that often works for me in these kinds of situations, if it helps, is to "reward" myself with time to think about the other thing if I do X hours of the thing I actually need to do. So, what if for, say, four hours of focus on studying, you "earn" one hour of focus on t...
by Heather
Fri May 03, 2019 12:05 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: ovulation
Replies: 25
Views: 1973

Re: ovulation

We have a great primer on using the pill on the main site (please remember we ask users to look for answers there before posting here on the boards!) here: Combined Oral Contraceptives (The Pill) . It includes the answer to that question: When you first start the pill, when it will be fully effectiv...
by Heather
Fri May 03, 2019 8:38 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: I need help...
Replies: 26
Views: 3408

Re: I need help...

Hey there, Idontknow. I've been thinking of you and hoping you're doing well. I also wanted to make sure that you saw this news this morning, because of the ways you expressed feeling about all this when it came to partnership: https://www.theguardian.com/society/2019/may/02/end-to-aids-in-sight-as-...
by Heather
Thu May 02, 2019 7:31 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Vulva
Replies: 18
Views: 788

Re: Vulva

workshops/blogs about self-care,fashion,design,grooming,and things like that These are a LOT of topics! For sure, there's all kinds of content online about all of those things. But our job is providing sex and relationships education rather than general internet referrals, so this is outside what w...
by Heather
Wed May 01, 2019 10:29 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: why do i want a baby at 14
Replies: 3
Views: 434

Re: why do i want a baby at 14

Well, that doesn't actually mean that -- it's kind of amazing how our feelings about things can surprise us when they are realities rather than just ideas. But I also think that how you feel about the gender of a potential child probably isn't that essential to the bigger issues here. Thanks for sha...
by Heather
Wed May 01, 2019 8:04 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Vulva
Replies: 18
Views: 788

Re: Vulva

I'm afraid I'm racing off to a medical appointment, so I don't have time to dig deep into this today! It's a pity, because talking about what real, live bodies are like is one of my favorite deep dives. But I promise, nearly everyone (with the exception of people who have certain disorders) sweats, ...
by Heather
Wed May 01, 2019 7:55 am
Forum: Sexual Health
Topic: I just read a bunch of questionable information on birth control and I need to know if any of it is actually true
Replies: 11
Views: 2364

Re: I just read a bunch of questionable information on birth control and I need to know if any of it is actually true

Hey, Jon. I'm actually off today because of a medical appointment I need to hurry to, so I'm afraid I can't take as much time with this post to you as I'd like. But we often don't have other staff around on the boards on Wednesdays, so I didn't want you to have to wait another day for an answer. We ...
by Heather
Tue Apr 30, 2019 1:22 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Relationship
Replies: 5
Views: 527

Re: Relationship

Sure. When we make agreements about sexual exclusivity, they're generally about people in real life and what, if any, sexual actions -- not thoughts or fantasies -- we engage in with other people outside the relationship. Those agreements also, to be healthy and sound, need to be about increasing ou...
by Heather
Tue Apr 30, 2019 1:11 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Relationship
Replies: 5
Views: 527

Re: Relationship

What is and isn't cheating isn't universal: that's something everyone in a given relationship needs to talk about and make agreements about. If you aren't sure what is or isn't cheating in your relationship, that's a good indication you and your boyfriend haven't yet made any agreements about exclus...
by Heather
Tue Apr 30, 2019 12:32 pm
Forum: Ask Us!
Topic: ovulation
Replies: 25
Views: 1973

Re: ovulation

How about by saying, "I often struggle with severe and chronic anxiety about pregnancy, even when I am using very effective methods of birth control."
by Heather
Tue Apr 30, 2019 12:30 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: why do i want a baby at 14
Replies: 3
Views: 434

Re: why do i want a baby at 14

Welcome to the boards, elliemorgue. You're not the first person to ask us something like this. We've even got an article from way back when that's one way of addressing some of this, if you like: I Want It NOW! I'm glad you asked about this, because this is something that can have a huge and long-te...
by Heather
Tue Apr 30, 2019 9:21 am
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Worried
Replies: 9
Views: 1371

Re: Worried

It's hard to wait scares out, especially when you have to do it without the care and support of the other person who got you in this spot to begin with. It can feel very scary and very isolating. If you want emotional support or to talk more about your feelings with all of this, we can at least offe...
by Heather
Mon Apr 29, 2019 4:10 pm
Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
Topic: Worried
Replies: 9
Views: 1371

Re: Worried

You get to decide, ideally, who you tell and who you don't. I'm sorry that it sounds like he may have told some people without asking you if that was okay first. I'm glad to hear you're not going to go out with him again: he hasn't sounded safe or okay in a bunch of ways. We're not going to engage i...

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