Search found 139 matches

by thewrit3r
Mon Jan 28, 2019 4:07 pm
Forum: Sex, Culture and Politics
Topic: Your partner's politics
Replies: 4
Views: 1933

Re: Your partner's politics

Like Sam said, there are somw political views I can’t budge on - especially identity politics. I think it’s ridiculous that someone’s identity is politicized (being black, gay, female, or just a minority in general) so that’s not something I can compromise on (and like Sam said, they probably wouldn...
by thewrit3r
Sun Jan 27, 2019 3:17 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Stressful night
Replies: 2
Views: 982

Re: Stressful night

Hi Sam, I did mention to her that she seemed out of it (I said she didn’t seem like she was feeling well) but I didn’t outright say she was drunk. I don’t know, that sounds more accusing than concerned but I feel like she has a right to know. She just texted me back that her meds were the reason she...
by thewrit3r
Sun Jan 27, 2019 9:27 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Stressful night
Replies: 2
Views: 982

Stressful night

Last night I went dancing with some friends at a social. It was a lot of fun but then I saw one of my friends come in and she was really drunk. When I went to hug her, she was literally stumbling and couldn’t really control her body movements. Thankfully she came with friends so they were watching h...
by thewrit3r
Sat Nov 10, 2018 11:40 am
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: What's your favourite Scarleteen article?
Replies: 7
Views: 3150

Re: What's your favourite Scarleteen article?

This one is awesome when I’m considering being sexually active and my needs and wants: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/yes_no_maybe_so_a_sexual_inventory_stocklist I also love this one, especially since my sex education was next to none: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/can_i_get_pr...
by thewrit3r
Sat Nov 10, 2018 11:35 am
Forum: Et Cetera
Topic: What is one thing you learned about sex & yourself this year?
Replies: 16
Views: 6203

Re: What is one thing you learned about sex & yourself this year?

Realizing that sex is and can be multiple things, that sexuality can be fluid and that’s perfectly okay, I deserve respect from my partner and vice versa, and sex should be consensual, fun, and safe!
by thewrit3r
Sun Oct 21, 2018 4:52 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Who are you comfortable talking about sex with?
Replies: 8
Views: 3662

Re: Who are you comfortable talking about sex with?

Maybe because I’m on a college campus but it’s pretty easy to talk to people at sex when it’s say, an overview and not detailed - like gender norms with sex, consent, kinks, etc. I also talk with my mom a bit and sometimes my older brother about the politics of sex. With more personal stuff I have a...
by thewrit3r
Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:25 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Creeped out by myself.
Replies: 6
Views: 1464

Re: Creeped out by myself.

Hi, Before I say anything else, I saw that you mentioned you have GAD. Are you receiving any treatment for it? Medication, therapy, something else? I’ve found from personal experience that mental illness doesn’t go away on its own and it really needs to be adddressed if you want to feel better. Beca...
by thewrit3r
Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:15 am
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Tales of a 20-year-old virgin
Replies: 4
Views: 2132

Re: Tales of a 20-year-old virgin

Hey, 21-year-old virgin here :) just wanted to add my two cents to show you that it’s not “weird” or “wrong” to be a virgin at any age. And like Alice said it really depends on your definition of virgin. Are you just counting vaginal intercourse? There are a lot of sexual acts that are just as valid...
by thewrit3r
Thu Sep 20, 2018 8:06 am
Forum: Sex, Culture and Politics
Topic: What's "Real Sex?" (Seriously.)
Replies: 8
Views: 7951

Re: What's "Real Sex?" (Seriously.)

This definitely bothers me a lot, well it bothered me a lot more until I came on here and you all helped me see that sex is not just PIV intercourse but a range of activities. I felt good about that because while I haven’t had sex with anyone yet, I know I don’t enjoy penetration and I thought that ...
by thewrit3r
Tue Aug 14, 2018 5:19 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Bi the way
Replies: 4
Views: 4615

Re: Bi the way

Hi again, I can’t believe I’m going back to this, but here I am haha. I’ve been thinking a lot about my sexuality because I feel like it keeps changing! There’s a large part of me that feels like I’m a “fake” bisexual - that I want to be bisexual because it opens my dating pool, but I don’t want to ...
by thewrit3r
Tue Aug 14, 2018 5:10 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Ashamed About My Sexual Preferences
Replies: 5
Views: 1333

Re: Ashamed About My Sexual Preferences

You’re definitely not alone. I don’t enjoy penetration at all, it’s not bad I just get no pleasure. But you keep hearing about how intercourses is the be it all for sex which is wrong, heteronormative, and just generalizing sexuality when it’s really really broad. Outercourse is much more appealing ...
by thewrit3r
Sat Feb 24, 2018 5:59 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Staying at a friend’s
Replies: 4
Views: 1558

Re: Staying at a friend’s

Sorry for the really late reply. Yes, that makes sense. I just tend to be a perfectionist so I’m hard on myself, but I’m trying to work on it. I think a lot of what you said would be helpful, realizing that we’ve grown up in a society based on assumptions regarding gender and how people of certain g...
by thewrit3r
Sun Feb 11, 2018 12:29 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Staying at a friend’s
Replies: 4
Views: 1558

Re: Staying at a friend’s

Hi, Thanks for the response. I didn’t end up staying at his house for other reasons, but even though the uncomfortable feeling has lessened it’s still there. Like my mom mentioned that I may not want to tell my dad since he might have reservations about it. And I hate that because I know it’s probab...
by thewrit3r
Thu Feb 08, 2018 7:16 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Staying at a friend’s
Replies: 4
Views: 1558

Staying at a friend’s

I just told my mom I was staying at a friend’s house tomorrow and she was shocked when I told her it was a male friend with a male roommate. I didn’t think about it being a big deal but now I’m wondering. Isn’t it heteronormative to think it’s weird to have male and female roommates? Then again me q...
by thewrit3r
Thu Dec 28, 2017 7:14 am
Forum: Sex, Culture and Politics
Topic: Ever Wondered Where a Sex or Dating Thing Came From?
Replies: 5
Views: 3734

Re: Ever Wondered Where a Sex or Dating Thing Came From?

Is there any reason why penile-vaginal intercourse is often considered “real” sex?
by thewrit3r
Sat Dec 16, 2017 8:39 am
Forum: Relationships
Topic: help :(
Replies: 6
Views: 770

Re: help :(

Hi, Xmetalgirl, hope you don’t mind me popping in. First off, I can only imagine how upsetting this is. You wanted a relationship with him deeper than the one you have now but he doesn’t. That can be incredibly frustrating and sad. But bear in mind no one can make another person “want” to be in a re...
by thewrit3r
Sat Dec 02, 2017 4:29 pm
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: Fear of sexual assault
Replies: 3
Views: 3446

Re: Fear of sexual assault

Thanks for replying. Yeah, I think it would be good for me to tell her. I’m just nervous; I’ve never brought up anything this serious and intimate with my therapist before. But I’ve had her for awhile and am starting to feel more comfortable with her. I know I can bring it up with her, it’s just the...
by thewrit3r
Sat Dec 02, 2017 7:16 am
Forum: Supporting Each Other
Topic: Fear of sexual assault
Replies: 3
Views: 3446

Fear of sexual assault

Hearing all these reports of men being revealed to have sexually assaulted someone has triggered some anxiety in me. I know most men aren’t abusers but what’s really scaring me is when people who knew the assaulters day that they never expected them to do that. It just makes me wonder if it can happ...
by thewrit3r
Thu Nov 16, 2017 7:10 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Confused About My Sexuality (Please Help!)
Replies: 11
Views: 4410

Re: Confused About My Sexuality (Please Help!)

Trust me, I don’t have all the answers but I’m glad I was able to help. And feel free to come back here if you have any other questions :)
by thewrit3r
Tue Nov 14, 2017 8:59 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Confused About My Sexuality (Please Help!)
Replies: 11
Views: 4410

Re: Confused About My Sexuality (Please Help!)

I know it’s frustrating not being 100% sure how you feel but trust me a LOT of people are the same boat. I think I changed my sexuality on here 3 times! What you feel now doesn’t negate what you felt in the past; it’s like if you used to enjoy a hobby at a younger age but now it doesn’t interest you...
by thewrit3r
Mon Nov 13, 2017 11:47 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Drunk
Replies: 83
Views: 9807

Re: Drunk

Echoing what everyone else has said, I am very sorry that happened to you. It’s not in any way your fault, it’s his fault, and you didn’t deserve to experience that. I don’t know if you’re religious in any way but I will keep you in my thoughts and I hope you can find the support you need❤️
by thewrit3r
Mon Nov 13, 2017 4:41 am
Forum: Abuse & Assault
Topic: Drunk
Replies: 83
Views: 9807

Re: Drunk

First off, I’m very sorry that happened to you. It shouldn’t have happened to you. You are not overreacting; he raped you. A person inebriated in any way cannot consent to sexual activity. Even if you didn’t say no you didn’t say yes; either way, you didn’t give your consent to him. I’m really worri...
by thewrit3r
Sat Nov 11, 2017 6:34 pm
Forum: Sex & Sexuality
Topic: Crushing (hard)
Replies: 5
Views: 1072

Re: Crushing (hard)

Haha it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one and it can happen to anyone regardless of age. I finally managed to speak to him this week even though it was just small talk but it was better than nothing :) I’m sure it’ll get easier in time. Thanks for responding. I know my question wasn’t super s...
by thewrit3r
Thu Nov 09, 2017 5:11 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Confused About My Sexuality (Please Help!)
Replies: 11
Views: 4410

Re: Confused About My Sexuality (Please Help!)

It’s really personal if you are attracted to men and women. Maybe if you can spend some time alone with your thoughts without media or other people telling you how you’re “supposed” to be it could make things a bit easier. I still think we don’t have everything figured out but maybe you’ll understan...
by thewrit3r
Wed Nov 08, 2017 5:43 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Confused About My Sexuality (Please Help!)
Replies: 11
Views: 4410

Re: Confused About My Sexuality (Please Help!)

Hi, LavaLamp, Don’t worry about your post being too long - I read the whole thing. And my response will probably be long (if not longer) and this might be all over the place so I apologize if it’s hard to read. I guess first where I want to start off is saying that sexuality is complicated, as I’m s...

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