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Sexuality Advice

Tired of Teasing

Anonymousssdude asks:

Hello there, i am 18 years old and my girlfriend is 16. She has been with around 17 other guys, given one blowjob and handjobs etc. but when it comes to me, she does not seem to care about what I want. I please her from fingering her, go down on her and we have sex as well. But when it comes to handjobs she does not seem to be willing to work in order to plessure me. The only thing she does is touch me down there in order to tease me which she finds funny but i hate it. What can i do to tell her in a nice way that i really would like her to do SOMETHING instead of just pissing me off? BTW we have been dating for around one and a half month and im getting sooo tired of it already. It would be okay if it was her first time, but thinking about the fact that she has done this to other guys makes me sick and tired of this relationship. It might be worth mentioning that this is the first real relationship of her's. Hope you can help me :/ have a good one

How can I protect my partner from HPV?

Lucilabolof asks:

I'm a 15-y/o girl who has recently fell in love with a 15-y/o girl that I met in December.
We've made it clear that we have romantic and sexual interests about each other, even though we think it's still too soon.
She knows that I've been sexually active with multiple partners for a couple years, and she's very enthusiastic about experiencing new feelings and desires (I'm the first female she's ever been interested in.)
We both agree that we're OK at the moment, but... I have HPV. She doesn't know because we haven't even had that much physical contact yet and we both agree that we want to wait for a while. I don't want her to be scared about it if we sometime decide we're going to have sex.
I have found no actual studies about how common is lesbian HPV transmission, so there is no way for me to talk her about the possibilities of getting the STI.
And even if there were reliable charts and stuff about this, I want her to be the safest she can be with me. Like, 100% safe of whatever could happen to her. I'm THAT in love.
I know and use the most common methods of safe lesbian sex, like using different condoms for toys, using gloves for intercourse, and female condoms for oral sex. But, STILL...
She's very excited about this whole I'm-gonna-lose-my-virginity-with-you thing, and I don't want to dissappoint her. There is no way to make sure that, if we scissor, she won't get infected. And she has told me that she'd like to scissor.
I mean, if she agreed to have sex with me even with the STI, I wouldn't want to. 'Cause I really want to take care of her. I'd feel extremely guilty if she got ill because of me. I'd like to protect her from all bad things even though that's impossible.
(I know I'm very cheesy and protective, she's OK with it too.)
What should I do? To have sex, or not to have sex?

Why doesn't my girlfriend enjoy sex?

tazzy asks:

Hi, me and my girlfriend are dating for almost 2 years now, we met when she was 19 and I was 21, we love each other and our relationship is going great, with only one exception - sex. We had our first sex few weeks after we have met and the problem was that she didn't feel almost anything during it, and we are dealing with this problem since then. We both had some sexual experiences before and she claims that she has never had experience like this, only that she hasn't reached orgasm every time but at least felt pleasure during it. So it looks that the problem is in me, but I don't know where. I don't think that my penis is so small (I've had around 20 sexual partners before her and never noticed such problem) plus when i finger her with just one finger, she likes it. It is similar when I touch her clit, she is able to reach orgasm very quickly this way, but when I touch it during sex, she says that it's a very little bit better but still nothing special and when I try to touch it after we try to have sex she doesn't feel anything at all. Long story short, she only liked having sex with me twice and only for a short time, so it is clear that we are very desperate about it but still cannot find solution. I have tried to google this many times and have never found a similar problem.

Are relationships really as complicated as people make them out to be?

Clueless2 asks:

I am LONELY. I just want a nice/easy relationship. I feel like all my friends that have dated someone slowly drifted away from my friend group. I don't want to leave my friends. They also talk about how much time/effort they put into relationships. I just want someone to go get ice cream with. Are relationships really as terrible and complicated as everyone makes them out to be? Sometimes I think I'd rather be forever alone than put that much effort into something.

Toy Queries

Tokenqueen asks:

If I get an IUD can I use a vibrator?

You Don't Need Your Moms' Permission to Have Sex.

Juliaaa8 asks:

I'm 18 years old and have been with my boyfriend for a little over 4 years. We're best friends and were so in love. The first time we had sex I was 16 and my mom found out and I was grounded and unable to see him for about a month and a half. We're both in college now and still together and he's coming down soon to visit me! We haven't had sex since that one time and since then my mom has made me ask her if I feel like I'm ready but every time I seem to ask her she shuts it down and makes me feel bad for wanting it. I really want to have sex with him when he comes down to see me and I'm scared to ask my mom. But I really want to explore my sexuality more and figure myself out more with him. How should I deal with this?

Hours of Intercourse? Nope. (And also: Ow.)

kayla17 asks:

Me and my boyfriend are both 17. Today we started sex but it only lasts 3 minutes. How can we make it last 1 or 2 hours?

On submission and speaking up

BrooklynnL asks:

I am a trained Submissive. I have only ever been in relationships with Dominants who know exactly how to be sexually/emotionally involved with a Sub. I am extremely into bondage/spanking/biting/ect., and the Doms that I have been involved with know exactly how to effectively provide that for me in a sexual relationship. I don't think I can even HAVE an orgasm without the aforementioned activities.
But recently I met this AMAZING guy that I have totally fallen for. He is perfect in every way and is just a total dream. He is pretty dominant, but I know he isn't a dom. We have been dating for almost 4 months now, and I haven't told him about my sexual past. We have been having sex but it isn't at all satisfying to me. I've been faking all of my orgasms, and have been putting up with the "Vanilla" sex since we've started dating. I'm afraid to tell him about my sexual preferences. I'm scared that hell think its disgusting or weird and run away. Or even worse, he'll stay but not be able to provide the things I need in a sexual relationship which will completely ruin our entire relationship all together. How do I effectively communicate to him my sexual needs and tell him that I've been hiding this from him? It's really hard for me to even think about doing that because as a Submissive I have always been with Dominants who always know exactly what I want and provide for my needs. Help!

The Problem Is Not Your Performance, It's Your Boyfriend

Meme28 asks:

My boyfriend REALLY wants to have sex with me. We're both 17. I don't want to because I'm afraid to be naked around him. I have given him oral sex. But he hasn't done anything but kiss me. Though, last night he caught me in the shower and asked if he could come in and I reluctantly agreed. We had sex, but after he told me that because I was a virgin I failed my first time. He also told me that my breasts are to small and my performance was terrible. He later told me he was sorry, and we had sex again. But he told me after that time I was horrible overall. I don't know if I'm that bad. I'm really nervous when he touches my breasts or vagina. Could this be affecting my performance? Any answers would help.

You Can't Test for Virginity

Tammyluvgurl asks:

Hello I'm 13 and don't plan on having sex but my mother says that when I'm 16-18 she is going to get me checked to see if I'm still a virgin because I'm religious and we believe in no sex till marriage. Even though I don't plan on having sex, does masturbation affect the test the doctors going to take? And how do they take this test? Because I don't want to masturbate and find out the doctor says I'm not a virgin. Is there even a way for the doctors to test it (because my mom could be bluffing)?

P.S. me and my moms relationship is good so she would trust me if I told her I didn't have sex plus if I did she would be understanding.

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