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To start off, I'm really self-conscious. I'm slightly heavyset, and practically hate myself for it. I know it's nothing really major, but nevertheless. I don't like my body.
My boyfriend is very athletic and is on one sport team or another all year round. He has a fantastic body and is really tan- me, on the other hand: un-muscular, pale (and pink, in some places), hairy (I have a trail of hair from my pubic area to my mid-stomach) and "flabby".
I don't feel comfortable taking off my clothes in front of him, much less having sex with him. Is there a way I can "train" myself to take my clothes off in front of him and not feel totally inferior?
I'm totally confused about my relationship, where it's going, I mean. I'm 14 years old and I have a 16 year old boyfriend, he's turning 17 in a few months. Since he's older, I know he has more sexual feelings and things like that, but I don't think I understand completely. We always fool around...kind of sexually...but not completely. We haven't had sex yet, and I think he might want to. I really don't know if I'm ready, mentally. I think it might ruin the relationship, I don't know what to tell him, or what to do when we start fooling around again. I mean, I enjoy it, but don't know how far to go with it, or where to stop. I feel like I need to talk to him, but no words come out. Whenever we "fool around" he asks like, "Is this okay?" or "Do you want me to stop?" I always let him do whatever, I don't mind at the time. But later on I really regret it, and wish I would have said something. What should I do?
I was directed to this site by a friend of mine and I'm really impressed in the amount of information and real life questions that are answered. I've had a few things on my mind that I just can't seem to figure out so I guess this is one the best place to ask.
I am 19 years old and my partner is 18. We have been dating for almost 8 months and are very much in love. We have been sexually active for the past few months, and we were both virgins. We have only used condoms during sex because my partner hasn't had time to make an appointment to get a prescription to go on "the pill" We are hoping to have her start soon (within the month if things go as planned) We have been very careful when we have sex. We make sure the condom is on properly and that both of us are sufficiently lubed before there is any penetration. We have had a few scares, but it just turned out to be us over reacting over a late period (but I bet we aren't the only ones who have done that). We have been through a lot together and have shared so much with each other in the time we have been together. I never force her to do anything sexually if she doesn't want to. I respect her mind and body like it should be.
We have had some really great experiences sexually but there are some things that are starting to bother me.
Ok I have a few questions. I’m 18 and have been with my boyfriend for about a year and have not been sexually active with him or anyone else in any way (no oral, hand jobs/fingering, or sex). I have fun making out with him, but he recently told me that he doesn’t want to make out heavily anymore because it isn’t turning him on as much anymore without the “big O at the end”. Is this normal? I sort of want to do more but feel a little uncomfortable. My bf is supportive of my limits (especially he since he didn’t lose his virginity till he was 21) and isn’t trying to force me or anything but still really wants to do more. I love him and I want to do more but am nervous. He is much older and much more experienced than I am. I have talked to him about being nervous and stuff and it has helped a little but not a lot. I have another question too: I have a LOT of clear discharge when we make out and dry hump. Is this normal? I feel nervous about letting him finger me because of this. I am also nervous about giving him a hand job and oral because I don’t know what to do after he ejaculates. It all just seems very messy. I feel like I don’t know enough about how to get into and out of the sexual situation… I feel ready but just too nervous to go on… Is there something that I can do that will make this more comfortable? What can I do? Please help!
P.S. Thank you so much. This site is amazing.
I'm 14 yrs old and this boy that I have been fooling around with, asked me if I would ever have sex with him. I do but I don't. If we use a condom, is there a high risk of getting pregnant? I also really like him alot. I just wish he would ask me out. Another question of mine is that, how can I bring up the matter of him asking me out?
I am a virgin, but my boyfriend has had sex before. I am positive that I am ready to have sex with him and we have attempted to do so three times already. The problem is that is causes me excruciating pain. I understand for most girls it causes some pain, but this pain is unbearable and I haven't been able to go through with it. When he fingers me he can fit 3 fingers in so I don't see what the problem is. We take our time and don't just skip right to sex. What should I do?
My girlfriend and I care about each other very much. recently we had decided to become sexually active. She has had previous partners though she was my first. She says that I satisfy her, though I have honestly told her she does not satisfy me. I told her it doesnt matter but she is very upset and I am myself bewildered. How can I not enjoy intercourse? Especially considering its a new and exciting experience?
I am 28 years old and got married four months ago. Both my husband (29 years old) and I were not virgins before marriage and had both been with two other people before we started dating each other. We made the mutual decision to abstain from intercourse until marriage for religious reasons and to be "right with God" this go around. We dated for two years by the date of our wedding. During that time we would engage in foreplay, oral sex and we enjoyed that. I always wanted to fool around more than him and I made that known while we were dating, but he would always say that it was too difficult to get that worked up and have to stop. I had to agree, so I learned to become patient.
As the relationship went on and we got engaged a year and a half in, during our six month engagement we started having less and less foreplay. As our wedding day approached I became increasingly more excited about FINALLY being able to have guilt free, passionate, fun sex. I would say things like, "I can't wait!" and "how often do you think we'll have sex?" and "We will be able to have sex anywhere in the house and anytime we want" etc. I intentionally said this to express how excited I was about having sex finally. He would respond that he was looking forward to it too but that he didn't know how often we would because he couldn't make statements about part of our relationship that didn't exist yet. He would even get uncomfortable when I would talk about orgasms, something that I've only had real success with achieving with the aid of a vibrator. So the wedding night came and there was no passion, no romance, no "making love" just sex. I thought as least he would take me out of my beautiful dress, NO he just stripped and hoped into the shower, then wanted to have sex in the shower for the first time, Not my vision of my wedding night I'd waited for for two years. The honeymoon was the same. When we do have sex it lasts about 5 min. We've never had spontaneous sex or morning sex or after a fight sex.
He says now he's just not that sexual of a person and I feel betrayed and let down that he didn't express this before we promised to spend the rest of our lives together. He has trouble getting and sometimes keeping an erection and I become frustrated when he turns me down for sex. I've heard of girls not being interested in sex, but never a guy. He just is not into spontaneous, passionate, fun, sex. I'm not even sure he knows the difference. I have had great sex in the past, the kind I can't wait for, but with my husband, it's not exciting and he doesn't even get turned on my sexy lingerie. He is not interested in going to the doctor to take something for his occasional impotence. At best we have sex once a week. I was expecting that "newlywed sex" like rabbits that everyone seems to talk about, is that just a myth? Please help!
Hi. I have been going out with my girlfriend for about a year. Actually we have this commitment thing going and we really love each other. The thing is that she feels very uncomfortable talking about sex related topics or even talking about kisses. I kind of get frustrated sometimes but never let it out because I understand. What I actually want to ask is how can I make her talk about sex? How can I end this uncomfortableness in her? Please know that she fully confides in me and truly trusts in me as well. Your help will be really appreciated. Thank you.
This question isn’t about a sexual issue, but I was hoping you could help me anyway. I’ve been going out with this guy for about 4 months now, and I’m getting a bit antsy. We’re both really busy with college and work, and we find it quite hard to organize dates and so on (we don’t go to the same college). Neither of us has invested a whole lot into this relationship, if you can call it one, but that’s fine with me at the moment. So that isn’t the problem. The one thing that’s bothering me is that I’m getting the impression that I ‘like’ him more than he does me. At least emotionally. Physically, there aren’t any issues. But I don’t think I want to be in any sort of one-sided relationship. This is the first guy I’ve ever been with, and I like him a lot, so I really don’t know how to approach this. Should I talk to him about it, or just let things go on as they are and see how they work out? Am I being completely neurotic?