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Relationships Advice

Managing Vulnerability & Sexual Insecurity

Worried asks:

Hi I'm 15 years old (male) and I want to wait till I find someone I really like before I have sex, but I want them to be a virgin too. I'm worried that if I wait too long all the pretty girls will have had sex and I won't be good at it yet, I'm worried that if they've already had sex that I won't be good enough for them, what should I do?

Sex isn't appealing, but I want to be close to my partner.

Anonymous asks:

I'm 16 and have been with my boyriend, also 16, for 5 months. He has only ever fingered me as I don't really like the thought of other sexual activities too appealing but feel I am ready for sex as it is a way to be as physically close to him as I am emotionally.

My only problem is is that my opening is really tight and can fit about 2 fingers maximum-- sorry this sounds disgusting? His friends tell me about his "massive penis" and I'm scared he won't be able to fit it in. We have spoken about sex and both agreed that we want to do it, but now I'm just nervous that it won't go as I'd always expected it because I'm too tight? Please help.

What he's doing isn't working for me, but how do I tell him that?

keepintime asks:

My Boyfriend and I are new to doing anything sexual. We are both virgins and have never had intercourse, just oral. How do I tell him what he is doing does nothing for me and doesn't please me without hurting his feelings, and what should I say to him?

No erection four times now: what can I do?

Dan asks:

First of all, let me say I'm impressed by your mission here. A lot of people's first sex would be improved with real sex ed. My particular problem concerns erectile dysfunction. I'm only 19, yet I've experienced this problem 4 times. I've read that this can occasionally happen even to younger guys, but the last two were consecutive and I'm worried about how patient my girlfriend is. Is there anything I can do for this particular problem, maybe drugs?

We wouldn't get pregnant..not us.

Anonymous asks:

Hi in 16 turning 17 and its my first time on here and I find it very useful. I am soo glad that I finally found help. I've been dating my boyfriend for eight and a half months now, and we've had sex numerous times since. Well, this one time we wanted to see what it would feel like without a condom so we tried it and we both thought it felt soo good and so much better, but I pulled away right before he cummed. But the next time he showed up at my door step and surprised me and we both were really horny so we just had sex, and we were so into it that we both were like to each other..."What could possibly happen? We wouldn't get pregnant..not us" so we finished and he cummed inside of me. After that we freaked out! He told me to wash out my vagina with my shower tap. So I did. We are freaking out and are both praying I'm not pregnant. But there are some factors. I had my period during and he had cancer, so his doctor told him he has a 90% chance that he cant have kids. But I'm scared still. Will you please help me. Can I still be pregnant? I am waking up in the middle of the night constantly going pee, and I'm feeling sick every morning and all day! Please help us.

He's really into sex... but I'm not so sure.

Anonymous asks:

Hey. I have been going out with my boyfriend for a year now and he is really into sex. I am worried about it though. Whenever I'm at his house he always tries to touch me, but I don't want to be tight so I let him. Now he is hinting on sex! I am so embarrassed because I have nobody to speak to this about, my Mum died when I was little so I REALLY don't want to talk to my Dad about sex. Help!!!

Does the woman on top really feel good to guys?

Anonymous asks:

Me & my boyfriend have been going out for about a year & just recently started having sex. Every time we've had sex so far I've been on bottom & last night he asked me to be on top. I was nervous but went for it anyway...well, I had no idea what to do once I was up there. I thought about "riding" him (it wasnt too hard to figure out how to ride him) but is that really pleasurable for guys? Are there other ways for girls to be on top? Please help me!

Nothing else "works," so should I just have intercourse?

Anonymous asks:

I'm 20 years old and I've been dating my boyfriend for over 5 years. We are both virgins. Early in the relationship I told myself that I didn't want to have sex until marriage (mainly because I was, and still am, paranoid about becoming pregnant. He's been very patient and has never tried to force or guilt me into having sex. I guess I sort of have 2 separate questions:

I have given him HJs and BJs for a few years, but he has never done the same for me, not because he doesn't want to but because it just never feels good, even when I'm "in the mood." I've pretty much given up on even letting him try because I assume it's going to be hopeless. In addition, I've never masturbated for the same reason. Is there anything I can do to make it work?

Second, I've recently really been considering having sex with him, not because he's pushing me (he's not), but because I've just felt like I want to. I was considering going on the pill, but if not (or at least not yet), would taking EC afterward even with correct and "failure-free" condom use be a bad idea? Would it be pointless?

Can really different people really be together?

Leanne asks:

Is it possible for me to have a boyfriend who is a different age, color and personality than me?

I don't enjoy masturbation, but my partner is going out of town.

Dee asks:

I've been sexually active for a while now (I'm 20, sexually active for almost four years now) and have no interest in masturbation. All my girlfriends rave about it. I do it sometimes, mostly when my boyfriend and I have phone sex. But honestly, it really doesn't do anything for me. Plus, when I do masturbate, I can never achieve the type of orgasm I do when my boyfriend touches me. It's never as intense. My boyfriend's leaving for college again soon, and I think I'm going to go crazy without him being here to pleasure me. Any suggestions as to toot my own horn?

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