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Relationships Advice

So many questions... so many answers.

Anonymous asks:

Okay, here I go. I am 19 years old, and lost my v-card last September. I am new at this thing called sex. I have so many questions that I am scared to ask... my parents would freak out if they even knew that I have had sex. so I am turning to you for advice. I hope that I do this right, and that you can answer my questions.

• Is it supposed to hurt? I do not enjoy sex at all... is it because I am messed up? I have been having sex for over a year, and I have not had an orgasm or anything close to it. I don't know what I am doing wrong. It is getting to the point where i refuse to do it. it is not like i want to know how to get an orgasm, it is just that everytime i have sex i hurt. i don't know....

• Why are my periods very very irregular? At times I have gone 3 months without having it. I have not had mine since the beginning of July and it is the 6th of October.

• How can I tell if I get pregnant if my period is irregular? I have unprotected sex. I am not going to lie, the condom hurts me more than without it. My BF pulls out a few sec before he... you know.... Anyway, how do I tell if he pre-ejaculates? I don't want to be pregnant. I don't want to waste $20 every time i get a scare for a test. Yes,the best way to stop these scares is not have sex period.

These are loaded questions and I really do not know how to word these properly, so if there is anything you can help me with I would so greatly appreciate it. Thank you!

From friend to fingering: what now?

Paige asks:

Last week one of my best guy friends and I were hanging out and we started making out, things got a little out of control and he ended up fingering me. I've been really horny ever since, and I don't know what to do -- ask? Or just go back to being friends? Also, I didn't orgasm - is that normal?

Pressure from friends and worries about pain during intercourse

Anonymous asks:

I am 17 and all my friends have had sex already. I don't have a boyfriend but I really want to have sex. They all talk about it and I am the only one who cant talk about it coz - I have no clue! I want my first time to be really special, and I don't want to have the pain which all my friends have said comes with sex. I will wait for the right guy but I don't want my first time to be painful I want to enjoy it. Sooo could I buy a dildo and get the pain out of the way without the guy so when I come to have sex I wont be in pain? Does that work, or even if I have a dildo, will my first time having sex be painful? Is there any gel or stimulant to make me lubricated, I have mastapated before and no fluid has come so I am really worried that I don't produce that much! Also I can only fit one/ sometimes two fingers up there!
Please reply, I really need advice!

I hate my body, so I don't want my boyfriend to see it.

Olivia asks:

To start off, I'm really self-conscious. I'm slightly heavyset, and practically hate myself for it. I know it's nothing really major, but nevertheless. I don't like my body.

My boyfriend is very athletic and is on one sport team or another all year round. He has a fantastic body and is really tan- me, on the other hand: un-muscular, pale (and pink, in some places), hairy (I have a trail of hair from my pubic area to my mid-stomach) and "flabby".

I don't feel comfortable taking off my clothes in front of him, much less having sex with him. Is there a way I can "train" myself to take my clothes off in front of him and not feel totally inferior?

We fool around, but then I feel bad. What should I do?

Anonymous asks:

I'm totally confused about my relationship, where it's going, I mean. I'm 14 years old and I have a 16 year old boyfriend, he's turning 17 in a few months. Since he's older, I know he has more sexual feelings and things like that, but I don't think I understand completely. We always fool around...kind of sexually...but not completely. We haven't had sex yet, and I think he might want to. I really don't know if I'm ready, mentally. I think it might ruin the relationship, I don't know what to tell him, or what to do when we start fooling around again. I mean, I enjoy it, but don't know how far to go with it, or where to stop. I feel like I need to talk to him, but no words come out. Whenever we "fool around" he asks like, "Is this okay?" or "Do you want me to stop?" I always let him do whatever, I don't mind at the time. But later on I really regret it, and wish I would have said something. What should I do?

I can't get her to reach orgasm, and I really want her to.

Anonymous asks:

I was directed to this site by a friend of mine and I'm really impressed in the amount of information and real life questions that are answered. I've had a few things on my mind that I just can't seem to figure out so I guess this is one the best place to ask.

I am 19 years old and my partner is 18. We have been dating for almost 8 months and are very much in love. We have been sexually active for the past few months, and we were both virgins. We have only used condoms during sex because my partner hasn't had time to make an appointment to get a prescription to go on "the pill" We are hoping to have her start soon (within the month if things go as planned) We have been very careful when we have sex. We make sure the condom is on properly and that both of us are sufficiently lubed before there is any penetration. We have had a few scares, but it just turned out to be us over reacting over a late period (but I bet we aren't the only ones who have done that). We have been through a lot together and have shared so much with each other in the time we have been together. I never force her to do anything sexually if she doesn't want to. I respect her mind and body like it should be.

We have had some really great experiences sexually but there are some things that are starting to bother me.

Nervous for sex

Mandy asks:

Ok I have a few questions. I’m 18 and have been with my boyfriend for about a year and have not been sexually active with him or anyone else in any way (no oral, hand jobs/fingering, or sex). I have fun making out with him, but he recently told me that he doesn’t want to make out heavily anymore because it isn’t turning him on as much anymore without the “big O at the end”. Is this normal? I sort of want to do more but feel a little uncomfortable. My bf is supportive of my limits (especially he since he didn’t lose his virginity till he was 21) and isn’t trying to force me or anything but still really wants to do more. I love him and I want to do more but am nervous. He is much older and much more experienced than I am. I have talked to him about being nervous and stuff and it has helped a little but not a lot. I have another question too: I have a LOT of clear discharge when we make out and dry hump. Is this normal? I feel nervous about letting him finger me because of this. I am also nervous about giving him a hand job and oral because I don’t know what to do after he ejaculates. It all just seems very messy. I feel like I don’t know enough about how to get into and out of the sexual situation… I feel ready but just too nervous to go on… Is there something that I can do that will make this more comfortable? What can I do? Please help!
P.S. Thank you so much. This site is amazing.

He wants to have sex with me, but I want him to ask me out!

anonymous asks:

I'm 14 yrs old and this boy that I have been fooling around with, asked me if I would ever have sex with him. I do but I don't. If we use a condom, is there a high risk of getting pregnant? I also really like him alot. I just wish he would ask me out. Another question of mine is that, how can I bring up the matter of him asking me out?

Manual sex feels fine, so why does intercourse hurt so much?

Michelle asks:

I am a virgin, but my boyfriend has had sex before. I am positive that I am ready to have sex with him and we have attempted to do so three times already. The problem is that is causes me excruciating pain. I understand for most girls it causes some pain, but this pain is unbearable and I haven't been able to go through with it. When he fingers me he can fit 3 fingers in so I don't see what the problem is. We take our time and don't just skip right to sex. What should I do?

I'm a guy, so how come I don't enjoy intercourse?

John asks:

My girlfriend and I care about each other very much. recently we had decided to become sexually active. She has had previous partners though she was my first. She says that I satisfy her, though I have honestly told her she does not satisfy me. I told her it doesnt matter but she is very upset and I am myself bewildered. How can I not enjoy intercourse? Especially considering its a new and exciting experience?

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