Last summer ('06) I was pressured to sex by my former best friend. I kinda blocked it out and it's come back with full force now. I had a flash back when having sex with my boyfriend about a week ago and that was horrible! Any idea how I can cope with that?
And how do I cope with the feelings of guilt and shame. I really feel like the whole thing was partially my fault.. What happened was that we hadn't seen each other for a year cos he'd moved and when I came to visit we made out. He wanted to go further and I didn't. When I refused to go down on him he spiked me drink and made me do it when I was drunk. Unprotected. (Had STI screening since then, which was all clear...) I just feel like I could've somehow done something. Like keep an eye on my drink or say no more forcefully or just plain fight him off. I don't really know how to deal with this... I hope you can help..
Also, I was talking to a male friend the other day and he thought that men should have an option to legally not be fathers in case of a pregnancy. Like not be obliged to pay for child care and not be a part of the kids life whatsoever. I thought that this was ridiculous, but couldn't come up with any sound reasons why I though so.. It was just a general feeling. If this discussion comes up again what can I say?
I've been confused about my sexual attraction to a guy I've liked for the past 2 years. He has always made it clear that he only wants sex from me, but he has no romantic feelings for me, and I've always been confused about how far I've wanted to go with something so unstable. Recently we started our first year at the same college, and I guess with the new freedom and everything I decided that I would try to have sex with him. In that attempt, I just couldn't allow myself to do that, cuz when it started to hurt more and I started thinking about did I want to permanently lose something that I can't have back. But now after the situation I feel like I regret that decision and I want to try again, because I can't stop thinking about it. How can I let him know that? And am I wrong for wanting to have sex with someone who clearly only wants me for sex? And is it bad that I felt uncomfortable discussing what I want to do with him? I've looked around your site, and I see that it doesn't have much information about friends with benefits? Is that because it's condemned?
Me and my boyfriend have had unprotected sex about 3 times times within the last month, but I don't know the exact dates. I didn't know before that pre-cum had sperm in it, so I thought we were safe with the whole pregnancy issue if he just "pulled out," but when I read more about it, I realized I was wrong! The last time we had unprotected sex, he told me that got a little cum inside me, which really worried us both. It's been about two weeks since the last time we had unprotected sex and I have been having stomach aches and headaches and major mood swings and I have been peeing A LOT! I took two over-the-counter pregnancy tests and they both said negative, but I am worried that I may have taken the tests too early because my period is irregular (sometimes every few months) so I never know when it is going to be so I don't know if I have missed it yet or not. I am very worried. Could I be pregnant and how can I make sure? If I am pregnant, I'm gonna get an abortion. I live in Gillette Wyoming. Since I am 13 & my bf is 18 my mom told us we are not "allowed" to have sex, so if she found out she would press charges against him (which I don't want to happen) so I was wondering if there was any close places that I could get an abortion without telling my parents.
Yeah, so I'm a guy and I actally need some info. Its probably pretty weird, but I really need some info on my gf. I am a religious person and very straight-edge; I abstain from pre-maritial sex and alcohol and whatnot. A while back my girlfriend told me that she had an ex-boyfriend that fingered her w/o her consent. She tried to give him a second chance, but he did it again, so she stayed away from him. She was too afraid to tell him that hat he did was not ok with her. She is very upright too and was crying and everthing else when telling me this. I have no knowledge about female sex stuff, but is she still a virgin? It really upsets her to talk about it, so I dont like doing it, but would she have felt the same way she did as if she were having sex? Does that mak her a virgin or not
I am 21 and very pretty, but also very overweight. Close to 200lbs. I don't look TOO bad as my weight is well proportioned, very large hips, bottom and bust, but smaller waist and relatively slim face. Recently a guy has expressed a serious romantic interest in me. I know that he is usually attracted to much smaller girls and I find it very difficult to believe that he could really be attracted to me. Is it possible, for a guy who could very easily get a very "hot" girl, to be attracted to a pretty girl who is very fat?
I've done a bad, bad thing. I lost my virginity about a year ago in my sophomore year in high school to my ex. Since then I've slept with a couple more guys including my best friend, J (I guess that's better than using his real name). J was a virgin until we were "together," but I found out afterward that he's has feelings for me for a while now. To tell the truth, I thought we were just screwing around and getting drunk together, and then it lead to sex. Now he's all clingy, romantic and, "we should be together for the rest of our lives" kind of crap. I hate romantic. I want to be friends again but he sees us either as a couple or nothing. I'm so screwed. What should I do to make him my best friend again?
I have a urgent question that I had sex with my girl friend two months ago and now she has become pregnant and I don't want this pregnancy to be delivered and even don't want to abortion by incision. My doctor advised me to use CYTOTEC tablets of Pfizer, that it will sloughs off the pregnancy. I am not sure,please tell me is it right to use it? Does it work. It's urgent.
This site is amazing. I've followed many of the articles here and they've helped me alot throughout my questioning days.
But now, I've heard a lot about womens hymens being the maker and/or breaker of their virginity but in my case it wasn't. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 2 years a few days ago, and I didn't bleed like my friends told me I would. I had the tiniest spot of blood on my panties when I got home that night. My boyfriend is trying to question if I was a virgin or not to begin with, my friends are trying to say I must have had sex before. Now my boyfriend is starting to feel bad because he doesn't feel like he was "big" enough to break my virginity. I don't feel like losing my boyfriend because I might have a stretchier hymen that didn't need to be "popped".
How could I make them all realize this without sounding like a know-it-all pervert ??
My boyfriend is convinced that I should douche. I have told him about what I've read on this site about how bad they can be for you but he argues that they wouldn't exist if they were that bad. I have recently had 2 UTIs and 2 yeast infections within a couple of months so now I am wondering if maybe he is right and that I should douche... According to him, my vagina smells and tastes differently than it used to. Could douching "fix" this? Should I douche?? HELP!
I am celibate and a virgin. I don't masturbate. I think all forms of sexual activity are ok as long as people say safe and respectful, and this includes masturbation. I was never abused. I was brought up in a very open environment, where my parents never shied away from answering any kind of question about sex and answered very honestly and frankly, and never said anything was "sinful" or "shameful." And when they couldn't answer, both me and my siblings were pointed in the direction of good resources. There are plenty of things that "turn me on." I fantasize if I'm very horny but I wouldn't call that masturbation, and it's never that "graphic" in my head, it just "gets me off." I don't like watching others have sex either, like on tv or movies - I enjoy seeing people kiss or dance much more and think that is actually way more erotic!
MY QUESTION IS THIS: is there something wrong with me?
Me and my GF have been going out for about a year and I want to get her comfortable with us bringing in another girl, but I don't know how to approach her about it. I don't know what I should say to get her comfortable. I don't want to sound as if I want another girl, I just want to try something new.
I really want to have sex for the first time. But I am only thirteen. I know vaguely what to do and I know to use protection. But I was talking to my 17-year-old cousin (who has had sex before) if it hurt his girlfriend the first time. And he had said that she was screaming and she felt as if she wanted to die. This information scared me a little too much for comfort. I would like to know if it will hurt as much as he said it will or if he was just exaggerating. Thank you so much.
My boyfriend and I have been dating well over a year and we have talked about getting married. He said that on the honeymoon he is not going to wear a condom. I, however, want him to because I don't want to get pregnant right away. I know that you won't get pregnant right away every time, but I don't want to take the chance. I have told him this, yet he still insists on not wearing one. Basically I'm asking how can I change his mind or get him to see it from my point of view?
For the past few months my period hasn't been normal. I'll go weeks or sometimes a whole month without it. I am currently in a relatively new relationship (about 2 months now) and we've had sex a few times, but he pulls out right before. I know about the risk of pre-ejaculate and such, but how possible is it to get pregnant from it? Also, I want to start using condoms and while I feel comfortable with him, since we've never brought it up I am bit apprehensive about mentioning it. How can I tell him that if we're going to have sex we need to use condoms? I know it sounds simple and it should be, I'm probably just stressing out about bringing it up over nothing. The thing is that we're both pretty religious people and while I'm more than happy with our sex life, I didn't expect it wouldn't happen so soon. So, the dilemma is do I mention the condoms? Or should we quit having sex because of the way deep down we know we should live and behave. I'm not in anyway saying I don't "want" to have sex.. but I don't know if having sex is the best thing for us now. And if it isn't, how do I go about telling him when we've had sex a few times? (I know this is definitely a personal problem for me, but if you were in my position.. what do you think you'd do?)
Another quick one, in my last relationship that lasted 4 years, my boyfriend who was 27 and I would have sex, either vaginally or orally, and he could only become aroused and ejaculate once. With the person I am with now (who is 31) he'll get aroused and ejaculate and an hour later he's ready to go again. Is it just different in every person? Thanks so much for your time.
Hey there. I'm a 20-year-old male and I've been in a long term relationship with my girlfriend for about 3 years and 6 months and well ... we still haven't had sex. As weird as it seem it had never been a problem for me. We are both virgins and well, I just love her enough to wait. We've been together since I was 17 and back then well, sex wasn't that big of an issue.
But now that I'm 20, with college and going out and stuff, it's really starting to hurt my masculinity. I feel stupid really because I feel like by know it shouldn't be a big deal and it bothers me that it only gets to me when we are around other people, or when I'm watching sex advice shows on TV, or even just regular shows were sex life is a big deal.
I just would like to know two things:
- How can I deal with this thing? I mean is there like .. . some mental yoga or whatever method I can use to just go back to not caring that much about not having a sexual active life (which I've wanted since I'm like 15)
- How can I explain what I feel to my girlfriend? She doesn't really understand what I go through.
I'll be waiting for your answer. THANKS!
I read through the checklist today and much of the "Material" items I do not have. Well, primarily the money. But since I live in a country where STD-testing is free 'till you turn 23 and very cheap after that and where abortion, pre-natal care and pretty much any health care you need is widely available and very cheap too, do I really need the money?
Another thing, do you have to use lube? Me and my boyfriend go without condoms (been monogamous since November last year..) and it feels amazing without lube...
A friend of mine is severely frightened that she might be pregnant, and I thought I would do a little research to help her out.
She recently had unprotected sex, but stopped halfway through, and neither party came. She knows that the risk there is pre-cum, and says that is why she is so frightened. Her menstruation cycle is not regular, sometimes she is 25 and sometimes 29, sometimes any number in between, but as she is getting closer to the day when she should start, she is freaking out. She thinks she is imagining the cramps, because they are not as strong as they used to be or not as long-lasting.
If she is pregnant, she wants to have an abortion. Her fiance is in the military and being deployed, and she wants to finish school. She is also very broke; where can I find information for her on free abortion clinics, or how to get help paying for an abortion? Her parents are very Catholic, and just recently disowned her because they couldn't all get along, so she has no emotional or financial support there. Any advice?
I have a problem: I think I'm addicted to stress, or at least the relief when stress has passed. I'm a very overly paranoid person and yet I keep acting carelessly and doing risky things.
I don't want to get pregnant, I'm not on pills, and yet I'm always doing something sexual with my boyfriend.
- Sometimes I'll sit on his penis naked...him not in me, but me on his shaft.
- I've swallowed, kissed him and had him preform oral
- We have sex quite regularly although we always use new condoms and I check for tears right away
- Today I've probably done the stupidest thing of all....I've let him put his penis inside me unprotected (he urinated before hand to rid himself of any cum, it was for only a few seconds and he didn't move it much, and I put Purell inside myself after)
I know it was stupid! I dont know why I always do this to myself.I make myself sick with worry each and every time and yet I cannot control myself. I dont think I'm addicted to sex or anything, but I do think I'm hooked on stress. Have you ever heard such a stupid thing? I always do things that stress me out. I leave huge projects to the last minute, I've purposely made myself late for things. I don't much care about the everyday things but the sexual stress is whats concerning me. I literally say to myself "no more sex till I get on pills" and yet the next time I'm with my boyfriend, I practically force myself on him. WHATS WRONG WITH ME?!!?!
I dunno exactly what I'm asking but any advice would be appreciated...oh and whats the likelyhood of getting pregnant from what I described? I'd go and get plan b but unfortunately I don't think I have access to it.
I had sex with a girl a week ago. She didn't say anything about contraceptives. After we had sex she said she wasn't on birth control. I asked her why she naver said anything? Anyhow I heard of a guy a few years ago who had the same problem. He took a bottle full of coke and turned her bottom up and poured the bottle into her vagina. I told her about this. She was willing to try it. So we did the deed. Is this a safe practice? If she misses her period would it be safe to learn how to use a coat hanger? It would be sterile. Is there somewhere you can learn to perform an abortion with a wire?