My boyfriend always wants to have sex. But I am never really in the mood to have it but I do anyways so I dont make him mad. When me and him him have sex I don't feel anything, and I never have a orgasm and I don't know why. Is there something wrong with me? Am I wrong for not telling him that I don't get off?
I'm very confused with my sexuality; I'm a 17-year-old Austrailian male who is definitely attracted to women, but at the same time have an attraction to men that mostly involves fantasies where I play the receptive "bottom" role. I have acted upon these fantasies and sought out sex with other men, however every time it comes to engaging in oral or anal sex I enjoy it far less than I thought I would, even to the point of being bored! Every time I swear it will be my last because I didn't enjoy it, but lo and behold I get aroused again and seek out sex with men, and leave again disappointed. I'm also not attracted to the actual man; more the penis. I don't know what this means; it's worth noting that I have engaged in sexual activity with women, in everything other than actual intercourse and enjoyed it greatly. Add to the confusion the fact that I have a longing to crossdress, especially in women's lingerie, and I'm about as confused as it's possible to be. Please help shed some light on the situation!
I am 21 years old and am a virgin. I am currently single, but I had a boyfriend in high school and part of college and we never actually had sex, but did everything leading up to it. A part of me always felt like I wasn't ready to be having sex with him even though I was attracted to him. Maybe it was because I was so young then. I always thought I would wait until marriage to have sex, but I also always thought I would be getting married quite early in my life (around 22 or 23). Now I have realized that I have no desire to get married that early, but I don't want to wait until I am in my upper 20's to experience sex. I recently met a guy who I get along with quite well. We are able to communicate very easily and I also find him attractive. He is from another country and is quite experienced sexually, and we have talked about this before and about how I am a virgin. I have been having thoughts about losing my virginity to him if something were to happen between us. Right now we are friends, and not in any sort of relationship, but that doesn't bother me. I am not wanting a boyfriend right now. My question is whether losing my virginity to him (if the opportunity arose) would be a bad idea? I feel as though I could trust him with that part of myself and I feel like I would be okay with us remaining friends afterward. I have not mentioned any of this to him, as 1) I am not sure how to go about it and 2) I don't know if he is even thinking anything like this. Any thoughts, help would be appreciated!
I've heard several people on this site explain the issue of a male's penis size as it relates to pleasure to a female's vagina and Heather said once that the thicker the size the more sensation one will feel. The thing is that no one ever said that size truly matters everyone including Heather says it does not. So I have a question just to see if I'm hearing and understand you correct.
My boyfriend is lets say, for argument's sake, 4 inches long and 1 inch wide and when he's in I feel nothing, but my first lover was 8 inches long and 3 inches wide: you're saying he did not make it too big for my current boyfriend to give me or for himself to get good sensations? Your saying that if it was in reverse, that my first lover had the 4 inch by 1 inch penis, and I was fully lubricated my first time with him I still would have felt nothing then also? If that is what your saying then is it true that the women in adult fims who have sometimes hundreds of partners could get and give a man that has s 3 inch by 1 inch penis the same sensations that a virgin or a non virgin that has had only 1 partner could, assuming they both were willing and aroused fully and lubricated enough?
I live 1500 miles away from a guy I've been seeing. Without planning it, our travels have brought us to the same cities a couple times in the past few months. Unusual for me, but fun.
We're not dating, but I guess he likes me because he seems to be trying to hold things together between us.
I like him...sometimes.
Problem is he's SERIOUSLY weird and on top of it has waaay more experience than I do. I don't know if I can handle an ongoing physical relationship with him anymore - even if I'm 1500 miles away most of the time.
Yesterday while I was visiting him he told me he was sending porn to a female friend who wanted to see the evolution of his tastes from ages 18-25. Then he said he thought of all porn as art and an uncomfortable discussion followed when I disagreed. Guess I'm down for the count on that subject since I don't watch porn usually.
MMkay, so I'm 21, being doing all the right things with yearly exams, getting the tests I need, etc. I just read an article about how the vagina does not substantially change after intercourse, but the first time I had a pelvic exam my doctor said "you're lucky you're getting this done here, a lot of college clinics don't have virgin equipment." What? If there's no substantial change (which I am FAR more inclined to believe) then this makes absolutely no sense. I would ask what she meant, but her practice has moved and I see a different doctor now.
UNRELATED question that I always wanted to ask her but was too afraid to- I was sexually abused when I was little, and raped when I was 16. That for me also confuses the whole issue of what she said- first of all, I wasn't a virgin, and secondly, (my real question) how was it possible she thought I was a virgin, as my guess would be there would also be some kind of signs of past trauma?
As a note, I'm in counseling and doing pretty well but I'm scared to ask because of the oh-man-if-my-doctor-was-right-then-maybe-I'm-overreacting/wrong problem... I'm usually pretty good at trusting myself on this issue, but this is one place I'm always afraid to go because it would be so concrete. (I also just moved for grad school and am seeing someone new and feel comfortable, but I will make a point to ask her too.)
I have been raped on several occasions by my father and it is my fault. I should have listened to my mother but I didn’t. I am now 16 years old. Being in the world is the last thing that I want right now. I tried to kill myself on several occasions. I feel so dirty and worthless at this point. I have realized that since then my period takes months to come, the last time I had it was 5 months ago. When it comes it stay for weeks sometimes months. Since I have been raped, is this affecting my cycle?
Lemontree asks: I am 20 years old and have been on the pill for about 2 years now and at first me and my boyfriend (coming to our 3.5 year anniversary! yay) would always use a condom as well just to be that extra safe. But awhile back we discussed not using a condom for our first time and seeing as I was on pill (which I have never missed) knew we would be safe. We also tried researching online about when the safest time on the pill would be and I couldn't find much information...just that if you take the pill on time etc. then you should be safe all the time and other sites saying always use a condom no matter what (which me and my boyfriend disregard because we are each others firsts and only so no risk of catching anything).
Hi, I really need some help. Let me tell you what has happened. I'm 15 years old. My periods usually come anywhere from the 12th-to the 15th of the month. One night, I had anal sex, unprotected, but I didn't orgasm. When I had anal sex, it was two weeks after my period had ended. The next month, last month, My period came on the 19th. Is that normal? Is it just because I had sex? Could I be pregnant? Please help. If you think I might be pregnant, could you give me some self-abort advice, I can NOT tell my mother, and I have no way of getting a pregnancy test. Please please help me.
Binx_mojo asks:I am ready to have sex and my boyfriend is, too, but wants to wait because we are both Christians. Should I wait for him or should I dump him? What should I do?
Shadowlover says: I am feeling extremely guilty at the moment. I am a seventeen year old bisexual girl, and am currently involved in a relationship with a lovely boy. But I am also lusting after (or crushing on, really) another girl. The problem isn't that I can't have her, I know that, but rather the guilt I feel towards not wanting my boyfriend as much. I really like him and he loves me, but I don't know whether I want to stay with him, and I don't want to hurt his feelings as I have broken up with him before. But I really would prefer a relationship with another female, and feel extremely guilty as I am with someone. I have no clue what to do! Or even how to find another bi/gay girl if i do break up with my boy.
My husband and I have sex a lot...well it used to be more before I got pregnant with our daughter. Anyways, he has pushed for anal sex-which hurts so much-and the second time I let him go ahead and do it I was crying so much afterwards that he said he'd never ask again...but he has, and when I say no he pushes. I feel like he's punishing me for having cheated on last year...it's like by hurting me physically he's getting back at me for hurting him emotionally. Is that right? And is there any way I can make anal not hurt so much - lube doesn't help but so much.
I'm tall and black... I like this guy who's white, tall and the same age as me. I really like him and we always talk and joke around in class (we're kinda like the unofficial classclowns). But in this one class I somtimes feel his leg brush against mine... or his foot against mine. He teases me, and I tease him. I make him laugh, he makes me laugh. I'm not sure if he likes me back... and if he does.... what to next. Some of my friends say just ask him. But I'm not that daring! (I'm still kinda shy. I'm soo confused....are these signs that he likes me? And if he does, what do i do next?
I am currently living with my boyfriend (who is considerably older than I am) and he gave me genital herpes. He has supported me through the initial outbreak (which was terrifying, painful, and life-altering), and has continued to comfort and discuss our relationship with me. However, I have become quite depressed and feel that I have discarded my body's purity and feel that if I ever leave this man, I will not be worthy of a regular or healthy relationship.
I want to be married and have children at some point in my life, but feel like I don't deserve that since I was so cavalier and thoughtless when it came to my sexual health. I have been thinking about hurting myself or ending my life (of which I have a history), and have also considered hurting the man who I am beginning to feel deliberately infected me as a means to entrap and emotionally destroy me.
I am 20 years old and alone. I have no familial support and don't feel like I can tell my friends I am infected because they are healthy and may reject me. Any encouragement or advice will be greatly appreciated.
I am in the predicament of wanting a man to hold me but suspecting that I have not yet mastered my ability to honor my boundaries. When I have asked men to just hold me, they never keep their word, and after becoming turned on from the contact, I lose the will to turn down their advances. These men have had partners, or condemned monogamous relationships, and so sex complicates things emotionally.
Also, all my sexually active life I have been dealing with what my gynecologist recently characterized as vaginismus. So even though I get turned on while cuddling, my vagina rejects a man’s penis. I have to do anal and/or oral, which increasingly fails to completely satisfy the man nor me. Afterward I tend to feel inadequate, used, and defective, especially if I don’t hear from the man again. Not to sound cliché’ but I need human contact! Masturbation doesn’t offer the comfort and security of relaxing in a man’s arms. Maybe I should just ask a female friend to hold me. But the same thing could happen with her. I am almost 23 years old. How do I learn to exercise self restraint, so this cycle will end?
I am 15 years old, and my boyfriend I went farther in our relationship. It was both of are first times doing anything with someone else's private parts. When he was fingering me, he used one finger for a time and I really didn't feel it, it felt boring. He then did it with two and when I told him I still couldn't really feel it, he was shocked. He then got a little frustrated I think, and tried it pretty roughly and then it started to hurt. Is there something wrong with me? I also used a dildo once, so could have that like ran down my nerve endings down there?
I'm closing in on 18 and I've been in a relationship with a girl for a few months. We've had some fun with a little foreplay, going down on each other, mutual masturbation, everything minus sex toys and actual sex. Thing is, I'm really good at fingering her, and I can get two to three actual real orgasms out of her. I have heard in numerous places from numerous people that if a guy is good at fingering, he will most likely be good in bed. I know this is only a somewhat superstition, but do you guys know if this is true in most cases?
Okay, this happened to me a few months ago but it's been really bothering me. I was dating a guy for a while and when we started dating, I told him I didn't want to do anything sexual till I was 18. He promised that it was okay for him and he wouldn't do or try anything. Well, after we were dating for about 8 months, he started to change. He would get ticked off at me if I didn't spend every minute of my time with him. He wouldn't let me hang out or even talk to any of my friends. Then he started saying things to me that were perverted but I just shrugged them off as him just joking around. He then started touching my chest area, and I told him to stop, but he just acted like it was always an accident. He kept on doing it even at school, so I just gave up, and didn't care if he touched me there anymore even though in the back of my head I knew it was wrong. Then one day, we were over at his house lying on his bed, and I guess you could say we were making out. I really regret it now. Then he did something he never did before, He put his hands up my shirt and took off my bra. I couldn't say no because it was already too late.
This is really important! Okay, I need to know what I need to do to obtain birth control, by myself. My boyfriend and I have been sexually active for a few months but we always used condoms. Properly, I assure you. However, about a month ago, we both came to the conclusion that we wouldn't have vaginal sex anymore cause of how worried we both got about pregnancy risks afterwards. Now we're really wanting to start again. But I really want to get on the pill before we do. I just honestly don't know where to start with that. I have to make an appointment with a doctor right? Well, I don't know where to go for the appointment. The doctor that I've always gone to is like a family doctor and he even delivered me so that would just be awkward cause he's like friends with my mother and everything. And I don't know what to expect from the appointment. I really just wanna go in, get the birth control, and be outta there. But that's probably not the case. So what should I expect? And how much does the appointment, on top of the purchase of the birth control cost? My boyfriend will help with the money of course, but I'm scared if they're gonna do any tests. I've never had a pap smear or anything. It's hard that I have to do this alone. My mother I KNOW won't support me in this. But it's what I've decided to do and it's what I want. So I would appreciate some advice. /: Thank you.
I heard about a male birth control pill a few years ago but have not heard anything about it since. Does it even exist? Other than the condom, I feel like it's always the woman's responsibility. I know that the consequences of unprotected sex are heavier for women but I would love it if it wasn't always the woman who had to throw her body out of whack by taking birth control. That said, the pill and other hormonal birth control methods all seem to have some health risk involved (increased breast cancer risk, cardiovascular risk, etc.) I know we need to protect ourselves, but it seems extreme to take all these health risks to avoid pregnancy (considering the fact that many people who use birth control do not even use a condom or protection against STIs). I just think that if a man loved a woman, he would not want her to increase her risk of certain health problems by taking the pill. Is the condom really a dependable method for someone like me who refuses to take hormonal birth control? There are just so many choices to make when becoming sexually active.