Advice

Do vibrators cause a loss of sensitivity?

girl16
asks:
I have heard two different stories; one, that using a vibrator can do no harm, and two, that using a vibrator can do worlds of harm! I have heard that using one will desensitize the area and make sex with a real person totally unenjoyable and dissatisfying. Which theory is true?...

Vulva, I hardly knew ye

Anonymous
asks:
I don't know if I'm your average 20 year old. (virgin and only had one b.f.)I have never been able to insert a tampon correctly, nor have I ever looked at my own va-jay-jay. I recently shaved it for the first time. I really don't know what the call is for anything relating to my womanly junk, you know? I don't know if I should leave the hair down there, wax, or completely shave it all off....

I need more than looks to know if I find someone attractive: what does that mean in terms of my orientation?

Holly
asks:
I've noticed that I never really feel sexually attracted to anyone solely on the basis of how they look. I can find people aesthetically attractive. I'm not asexual, though-- I CAN be sexually attracted to people, it's just that I can't be particularly attracted to anyone unless I know what their personalities are like. So, my question is whether I should be considering myself bi, gay, pan, or......

He was going to pull out...but he didn't, and I feel bad taking Plan B.

Stacey
asks:
My boyfriend and I have been together for about 2 months and we just started having sex. He was my first and I am completely in love with him. We've been protected for 4 of the times with a condom, but tonight we didn't use one. He was about to pull out right before, but he came....

Differences in labial appearance and sensitivity: is something wrong?

C
asks:
I am an 18 year old virgin, and I have been reading about labia on your website. I realize labia come in all sorts of shapes, sizes and colors, and many other girls have posted similar concerns. My labia minora are very asymmetrical (I know, normal) and different colors (I know, also normal)....

Sex hurts her, but I don't want it to!

Anonymous
asks:
Ok, me and my girlfriend just now started to have sex and it's like still hurting her after like the 3rd time we couldn't really do it too long that time because it hurt her. And I'm worried if I'm not doing something right because I don't want to hurt her I want it to be enjoyable for her. What Do I Do!...

I want to wait, but he's pushing (literally) and I'm not sure what's going on!

Anonymous
asks:
My boyfriend is respectful of my wishes not to engage in pre-marital sex, but lately, he has been teasing me with his penis and sometimes applying pressure "down there." Then I always make sure he doesn't push any further, but a few times he has pushed a little bit into my labia. But lately, I have been wondering I have lost my virginity...have I?...

How do I tell her I want to get sexual?

Anonymous
asks:
I have been with my girlfriend for 2 months and I want to do a little more then just kiss. How can I tell her that without her thinking I'm taking advantage of her or her thinking that's all I want?...

Why can't I get it up?

Anonymous
asks:
Okay, here's my dilemma. I am 16 and sexually active. I've been with my girlfriend for a year and a half. We've used to have sex perfectly with no problems until about a couple of months ago. Now, I can't even get an erection and I don't ever feel horny anymore at all. I ask all my friends if they have this problem but they say no, they can get erections very quickly....

Sex as punishment?

Anonymous
asks:
My husband and I have sex a lot...well it used to be more before I got pregnant with our daughter. Anyways, he has pushed for anal sex-which hurts so much-and the second time I let him go ahead and do it I was crying so much afterwards that he said he'd never ask again...but he has, and when I say no he pushes....

How do I calm down my sexual desires around others?

Guyman
asks:
I'm a 14 year old guy, and basically, I've had trouble not really "thinking" about sex. I know its my hormones and growing up, but really, how can you, calm sexual desires down, and, I'm going to a party next week, with lots of girls. So, can you help?...

She's a tomboy, so she likes girls, right?

Anonymous
asks:
My friend Chanel is a tomboy but isn't sure she likes girls because she isn't sure of herself what should I tell her or what should I do to make her come out her shell?...

Shooting blanks or a loaded gun?

Anonymous
asks:
I had this girlfriend and me and her always had unprotected sex and I was wondering why didn't I get her pregnant if I always ejaculated in her? This was like a 5 month thing that I had sex with her everyday and always ejaculated do you think that when I am ejaculating I'm shooting blanks cause I'm like really thinking about it. I'm 15 years old....

I love him: is that enough?

nerdlove
asks:
The truth is: I am scared. But also anxious, excited, curious. My boyfriend and I have an attraction unlike any I've ever known. He always tells me to let him know if I want to stop, and then he will stop. I want to be intimate with him, and I've definitely thought about it, but it could always be too much too soon. I feel we may engage in sex soon. I don't really know how to do anything, though....

Where do those crazy eggs go?

tarap
asks:
I have been on the Cyclin contraceptive pill for about 4 months now. Before that I was on Diane 35. I understand that the bleeding that occurs when we are on the pill is not technically a period because we have not ovulated and therefore have not released an egg. My question is, in that case, where do the eggs go?...

Am I Blue?

Kaitlynne
asks:
I was wondering exactly what "blue-balls" meant for guys. My boyfriend mentioned it recently when he was complaining that I didn't go all the way when we were messing around....

The Great No-Orgasm-From-Intercourse Conundrum

Anonymous
asks:
I'm 18, female and my boyfriend and I had no previous sexual relationships. I've been engaging in intercourse about a month now, and I was wondering why I haven't orgasmed yet. I've been able to orgasm through masturbation but not with my boyfriend doing the work. What do you think is wrong? Is it normal? Or are we just too inexperienced? If so how do I tell my boyfriend about it? ...

Why don't I self-lubricate enough?

Anonymous
asks:
I am 22 and had my first sexual experience with my boyfriend 6 moths ago after a year of dating. We have a very nice relationship and love each other. I have taken pills and we always use a condom. For some reason, even though it doesn't hurt, many times I am very turned on and have natural lubrication but end up drying up completely after a few minutes....

Without condoms, I only last five minutes: what's wrong with me?

Kris
asks:
My girlfriend and I have been dating for over a year. I have never loved or felt this way about a girl. We have been sexually active ever since we started hooking-up and dated. She has the ring, and I like not having to use a condom. She is the first girl I have never worn a condom with though. At first I could last 15 to 20 min of intense intercourse and now I last 5 min tops....

I'm not ready...but am I just overthinking it?

Barbara
asks:
I have been so grateful for this site, it has been wonderful in making me more comfortable about my relationship. Basically, it comes down to the fact that my boyfriend and I are at the point where sex would seem like the next natural step, but every time we get close, we end up having a discussion instead....

I didn't want to go without protection, but could I be pregnant?

anonymous
asks:
Ok, so I lost my virginity at 14. I'm 16 now, and I had unprotected sex about 2 weeks ago with my boyfriend who is 18. I didn't want to have it without a condom because I'm not on birth control, but he wanted to, and he's done so much for me in the past (not sexually), that I felt I owed him this. I told him that the only way I would have unprotected sex, he would have to pull out....