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Morning sickness/telling from orgasm

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KUNJU asks:

I heard that women will vomit as a sign of pregnancy. How many days after an intercourse a women usually vomits? I have another doubt also. How can I realise that my partner had an orgasm? I mean without asking her.

Heather Corinna replies:

Per the vomiting, you're referring to morning sickness: when most women are pregnant, they will experience some nausea through at least part of their pregnancy. For some, that will result in vomiting: for others, it won't.

But understand that if you're looking for vomit to determine if a pregnancy has happened, that's not real smart. While some women will have morning sickness early in pregnancies, plenty will not, and no matter what a person intends to do about a pregnancy -- whether they're going to terminate or continue -- it's important to know if you're pregnant as soon as possible so that you can either terminate within the small window it's possible, or start getting pre-natal care early on to assure a health infant and mother if pregnancy is going to be continued.

Too, know that pregnancy isn't something that happens instantly with intercourse: conception is a process that takes a generous handful of days to complete.

If you suspect your partner may be pregnant, then she needs to take a pregnancy test. And if you're having sex without using reliable birth control and she does not WANT to become pregnant, then it's high time to step it up and start using a reliable birth control method, like condoms, consistently.

In terms of your question about orgasm, the only real answer is that besides asking a partner, there really is no absolute way to know. Certainly, over time with a partner, we'll get a pretty good idea of when it's happening, but even when we're pretty familiar with someone's sexual responses, it can be easy to confuse really high arousal for orgasm.

So, what's the big with asking? That's what most of us do, ultimately -- we just check in with partners verbally as we're going along, or when one of us feels "finished" or has reached orgasm, and ask if your partner has gotten there yet, too -- such as, "I'm good now -- how about you? Want me to do something else for you?" If communicating that way with sex is a problem, that's a problem you're going to want to fix, because being able to talk to one another that way is really key to having a sex life that's satisfying for everyone involved.

written 14 Jun 2007 . updated 06 Dec 2012

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