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My friend and I are both virgins, but he isn't feeling good about it anymore.

Anonymous asks:

I'm an 18 year old girl looking for advice to give a (just-turned) 26 year old male. That sounds odd, but my best friend is 8 years older than I am, and we're both virgins. While I'm proud of my decision to wait, my friend has become increasingly insecure with his. As our friendship has progressed I've found that my words have become less comforting, I suppose because of the difference in age and gender. There is so much unspoken pressure on girls and their sexuality in our society- but with males it is so much more overt, and his increasing age only increases his shame. I can't go to an adult sexuality site for an answer because those are irrelevent to me, and you're my favorite internet source of advice and information, so I hope you can help me deal with my friend. How can I let him know that nothing is wrong with him, and how can I build his confidence? How can I avoid seeming condescending (especially with someone so much older than I am)? All of his friends have had sex, so there's a significant wall in the conversation whenever he tries to talk about it with them. I'm scared that that wall is growing between us, not because of a difference in experience, but, again, in age (and possibly gender). How can I approach him with this topic without him becoming defensive? How can I make sure he knows I'm there for him? In college he saved himself for a girl that led him on because she was afraid of her own sexuality, she's now a proud lesbian and they're close friends, but I think it makes him feel worthless and incapable of a real relationship. He's so good to his friends, how can I get him to let me be the friend he is? How can I protect him from self-destruction and stop the label "virgin" from ruling his life?

Raised to think sex was dirty and it's left me feeling inhuman and insecure

Anonymous asks:

As a catholic, I was raised believing sex was dirty. My family never spoke about sex and so I am completely naive to everything. And despite the sex-ed classes I had in school, everything is still so abstract to me. I never even really had the desire to have sex or to explore my sexuality. It was all just taboo in my mind. I am now 24 and a virgin and have been with my boyfriend for a while now. And as our relationship progresses, we want to become more intimate. We have tried to have sex a few times but it hasn't worked. I know it is my fault because he is not a virgin. I have wanted to do it with him but I get scared and he doesn't force it. Because of my negative sexual upbringing, I feel very uncomfortable talking about sex so I have avoided discussing it with him. My friends tell me sex is perfectly natural, but in the back of my mind, I still think that I am committing a sin by having sex or by doing anything sexual. Is there any way to alleviate these feelings of inadequacy and fear? Most people, despite their up-bringing, do find it normal to have sex at one time or another. They learn about sexuality. And I am still completely naive to everything. I feel like unhuman or something.

Can I insert my finger into my cervix?

anonymous asks:

Okay, let me start by saying that I am very sexually curious I can touch my cervix by fisting and I am always careful and very clean when I do. My question is: I know it world hurt very bad and I'm not conserned about that but I want to try to insert a finger into my cervix I know it is not recommended that I do, but I want to try, is this something that I could do if I was careful and clean and there was nothing sharp? I want to make sure before I do it. I might try either way because I enjoy pain and im very curious. I have heard someone say that her husband has when she was pregnant but I want to try?

Wasn't that a safe time to go unprotected?

Kayla asks:

Me and my boyfriend had unprotected sex on the second to last day of my period, we thought this would be safe as it is highly unlikely to become pregnant at that time. I am now 8 days late, and never usually late, but have been experiencing abdominal cramps for about 4 days on and off as though my period is going to start. Could I be pregnant?

Unprotected anal sex, pregnancy risks, and self-abortion

Morgan asks:

Hi, I really need some help. Let me tell you what has happened. I'm 15 years old. My periods usually come anywhere from the 12th-to the 15th of the month. One night, I had anal sex, unprotected, but I didn't orgasm. When I had anal sex, it was two weeks after my period had ended. The next month, last month, My period came on the 19th. Is that normal? Is it just because I had sex? Could I be pregnant? Please help. If you think I might be pregnant, could you give me some self-abort advice, I can NOT tell my mother, and I have no way of getting a pregnancy test. Please please help me.

How can a girl protect herself if she doesn't marry a guy she intercoursed, but someone else?

anonymous asks:

It is usually said that after an intercourse, a female vaginal membrane got broken and hence the blood comes out of vagina, it is also said that this blood comes out only for the first time of intercourse. This blood is the only proof with a girl that she's a virgin.

Please explain me either all these facts are right. If a girl had a sex before marriage and lost her virginity and by the time she realized that intercourse is not the right thing before marriage and abstains from doing it again, can she be develop again? What are the ways of recovering. How can a girl protect herself if she doesn't marry a guy she intercoursed, but someone else?

Why are my labia so weird?

WantonWonton asks:

I am positive I have a malformed vagina and it makes me very self conscious. I have enlarged asymmetrical labia minor folds which do not protrude the beginning half of my vagina, but do on the latter half and obscure my vaginal opening. This extra flesh is brown in color and not a healthy pink color.
Will this interfere with my ability to have intercourse later on? Is this in fact a "malformation" or is this "type" of labia not as uncommon as I think it is? Should I have labiaplasty?

Misc. semi pertinent facts:
I'm in my late teens, but not yet an adult and a virgin.

One positive test, one negative test: am I pregnant or not?

anonymous asks:

My boyfriend and I had sex without a condom 2 times and when he cummed in me the first time I thought I was pregnant and I took a test and it said positive and I took another one of a different brand and it said negative so I didn't worry about it the second time he cummed in me I got my period the next day could I be pregnant now?

How could I check if I am still a virgin?

anonymous asks:

I just wanna ask could orgasm make me lose my virginity? How could I check if I am still a virgin?

Bottoming, crossdressing and bisexuality have got me hella confused.

Anonymous asks:

I'm very confused with my sexuality; I'm a 17-year-old Austrailian male who is definitely attracted to women, but at the same time have an attraction to men that mostly involves fantasies where I play the receptive "bottom" role. I have acted upon these fantasies and sought out sex with other men, however every time it comes to engaging in oral or anal sex I enjoy it far less than I thought I would, even to the point of being bored! Every time I swear it will be my last because I didn't enjoy it, but lo and behold I get aroused again and seek out sex with men, and leave again disappointed. I'm also not attracted to the actual man; more the penis. I don't know what this means; it's worth noting that I have engaged in sexual activity with women, in everything other than actual intercourse and enjoyed it greatly. Add to the confusion the fact that I have a longing to crossdress, especially in women's lingerie, and I'm about as confused as it's possible to be. Please help shed some light on the situation!

Older, and recently married, but sexually inexperienced and feeling clueless.

Anonymous asks:

First of all, I am really thankful for your services. I am 29 yrs old female and recently got married to a 30 yr old guy. We have tried to sex couple of times but unsuccessful because of pain I experience when my husband tried to penetrate. Although we gathered useful information from your site, the main problem is that since we both are virgins we don't have much idea about these things. Secondly we both are not aroused at same time. Can you please advise us as to what is the best position or possibly the best way to do it first time?

I'm not comfortable with "dirty" talk, so how do I have phone sex?

anonymous asks:

I've been with my girlfriend for almost 10 months. We have been in a long distance relationship the whole time that we have been together but we have seen each other at least once a month and just recently spent the entire summer living together. But anyways I just moved back home and I need advice on how to have phone sex with her. Obviously we are having sex and I love her more then I have ever loved someone yet I can't seem to rid myself of this shyness I seem to have on the phone. I want to but I am shy and so is she. It's hard for me to say the dirty words to her because I've always watched my mouth around ladies. How can I overcome this? I need to know how to initiate, continue and end.

What if our feelings aren't perfectly mutual?

Anonymous asks:

This question isn’t about a sexual issue, but I was hoping you could help me anyway. I’ve been going out with this guy for about 4 months now, and I’m getting a bit antsy. We’re both really busy with college and work, and we find it quite hard to organize dates and so on (we don’t go to the same college). Neither of us has invested a whole lot into this relationship, if you can call it one, but that’s fine with me at the moment. So that isn’t the problem. The one thing that’s bothering me is that I’m getting the impression that I ‘like’ him more than he does me. At least emotionally. Physically, there aren’t any issues. But I don’t think I want to be in any sort of one-sided relationship. This is the first guy I’ve ever been with, and I like him a lot, so I really don’t know how to approach this. Should I talk to him about it, or just let things go on as they are and see how they work out? Am I being completely neurotic?

I'm 13 and totally sure I'm ready for sex.

Anonymous asks:

I'm 13 and I know that I'm totally ready to have sex. I no that everyone is ready at different ages and all my friends are surprised because half of them cant even talk about puberty without blushing. It's not like I'm seeing anyone so I'm not being pressured I'm just so ready and I want the first time over and done with. Is this such a big deal?

Can I have sex even though I don't have my period yet?

FunkyChick asks:

I am 14 and I do not have my period yet. I have been in a relationship with a guy for 4 months, and feel ready to have sex, but I don't know what do since I don't have my period. Help?

What's up with BV?

babiegurl11221 asks:

I got something called bacteria vaginosis and while some doctors say it's not a STD, a lot of the state health department's professionals consider it one. They say that although girls and women get it sometimes without sexual contact, a lot of them get it right after having sex. I have, and will consider it one. I've been treated for this thing three times and it never seems to go away. Do you or could you consider BV a STD? I didn't bleed after the first time, just horrible pain during and up to one hour after in my vagina. But the next day I felt this horrible cramp-like pain in the pit of my stomach like if I had my period -- is that normal? Will this thing ever go away?

Can I play with the cucumber?

anonymous asks:

I got a little creative one day and put a well-washed cucumber with Saran Wrap up my vagina while I was horny. I was wondering if this is safe, and if there's anymore ideas that I could use because I don't get pleasure from my fingers.

Can I use the shower head?

Annie asks:

I am 17, and for a long time I have been masturbating using the shower head. My only question really is if there is any danger in that?

What can I use for a vibrator?

Alice asks:

I really love to masturbate, and I've been using a back massager I found in the attic for clitoral stimulation. It feels great, but it is getting kind of old. I was wondering if there was any thing else I could use (other than my hand) to spice things up a bit. And is there any way I can get vibrators without my parents knowing?

Can I get pregnant from this lubrication?

Mimi asks:

My boyfriend and I were having sex and he let out some lubrication. Is it possible for me to get pregnant? I'm not worried, I'm just curious.

Why am I bleeding?

rachel asks:

I'm freaking out right now. I'm about to cry and see my doctor. I'm bleeding, but it's a brown blood instead of a red blood. Is this me spotting?

I lost my "V-card" on Wednesday. I don't know if he popped my cherry or not because I'm bleeding, but I don't know if it's me spotting or I'm on my period. But when I wipe theres like red blood, but I'm not peeing blood?? And I'm scared to go poop because there will be a lot of blood in the toilet and I'm terrified of blood.

I got birth control August 2. I'm on the shot.

Why hasn't my cherry popped?

anonymous asks:

Hey, I have had sexual intercourse a number of times with men and women and my cherry still hasn't popped. I'm worried that I might never be able to have children as a result. Is that true and how can I solve the problem?

...and he likes me to do to HIM, but won't do to me.

Jessica asks:

I'm 18 and have been sexually active with my boyfriend for about a year. We've done all sorts of things with each other, including oral sex. However, he refuses to perform oral on me. I've given him blowjobs many times. He says he enjoyed it very much, except he felt bad because he didn't want to reciprocate. He says that if I don't want to give him a blowjob, he would completely understand. But I love giving oral; I don't feel that it's unfair to me if I choose to do it. Even so, I really wish he would go down on me. When I asked him why he doesn't want to, he said he doesn't know. What could be bothering him, and what can I do to convince him that giving me head isn't as scary as it apparently seems to him?

Is liking how the anus smells perverted?

Sarika asks:

Delicate matter. My boyfriend and I both enjoy anal sex - that isn't the problem. He also tells me that he likes the smell of my anus (I should point out that this is after I've bathed - nothing to do with feces). When I masturbate I too like the scent of my anus but to hear him say it made me feel embarrassed. I told a friend, but she just said it was perverted and weird and reckons I should tell him that. I know sex is a personal matter, but am I that unusual?

What if a guy thinks my labia are gross?

Lucy asks:

I've been worried recently due to my labia being different sizes and one being rather stretchy. They have also gone darker in colour. Is this normal, different, a medical problem? I have been searching on the internet for some help on whether this is normal or not. Most articles say size difference is normal but this doesn't make the situation any easier for me. Oral sex seems a worrying thought, what if the guy is like "What the hell is up with this... gross... it doesn't look normal to me!" Even when it happens I'm going to worry he's thinking it. There's no way to tell if mine looks normal or not, I can't exactly ask my friends...embarrassing or what!? Anyway, I would be forever grateful for a bit of a suggestion.

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