Advice

When the Big O is a No-Show

Brandyf817
asks:
I am having a problem orgasming, like most women. I am 24 years old. I have tried masturbating myself thinking it will be more relaxing and easier, but its not. The problem I am having is I get so close, but I can't get all the way. I start to feel pleasure, then I feel my muscles start to tense up and spaz a little, but then it gets PAINFUL that I jerk away and can't make it to the orgasm....

Is it wrong to just have sex with my ex when I really want a relationship?

Oceangirl4
asks:
My ex boyfriend and I are really close and sometimes make out with each other when we are alone. He used to really like me still and I didn't feel the same way and now it has reversed and I really like him again but he doesn't want a relationship. We have talked about just being friends and doing stuff but is this wrong?...

Love, Growth, Fear & Other Kinds of Big-Scary-Wonderful

pixie9000
asks:
Can you explain to me what love is please? How does one feel? Can you describe the effects for me? or, is it the kind of thing you just have to know? Does it go away? Or is it something permanent? I think that I am falling in love with my boyfriend. He is a senior, and I am a junior. Next year he is going off to college, most likely a really prestigious one far away....

Are My Sperm Still Squirming?

Anonymous
asks:
I am 18 years old, and I am scared to touch my sperm. And when I do masturbate, I feel like I'm spreading it everywhere. If I even ejaculate or touch something with sperm on my hand, I am scared to death to touch it. Even 2 days later I feel like if I touch the spot I'll have sperm on me. I am miserable because I can't even masturbate, nor do I even enjoy having a wet dream....

My father isn't respecting my personal boundaries.

Halia
asks:
My father and I don't have the best relationship but he continually forces me to give him hugs, kisses, etc. even after I say no. It really bothers me, even if it is just a kiss on the cheek. He also comes in my room a lot (without knocking) and lays down in my TWIN size bed with me and wont leave even after I tell him to get up....

Can I get a girl pregnant if...

mcnclguy1210
asks:
Can a girl get pregnant if I ejaculated in the condom then took it off and then stuck my penis back in her but didn't ejaculate in her unprotected. What are the chances? ...

How can I warm up to my fat boyfriend?

Anonymous
asks:
Ok, so here is my dilemma. I just started college this past August. A few weeks into it my boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me. I thought I would never move on and so did everyone around me. So, a week or so before we got out for Christmas break I met a really awesome guy and we hit it off right away and so we started dating....

How can we have sex if he finishes before we even get started?

snapplefact
asks:
I have an amazing boyfriend. He's thoughtful, considerate and sweet - not to mention super cute - everything I've ever wanted. He likes me a lot, too, and he's always telling me how much he likes me and how beautiful I am and all that good stuff. The problem is, I think he likes me a little TOO much. We haven't had sex yet, but I don't know if we can!...

My culture insists on virginity: did I break my hymen with masturbation?

prince_12
asks:
I hope you would be able to answer my message as soon as possible. It is very urgent. I have passed through the site and decided of asking you some questions maybe you could help me. I am an Indian girl. My age is 26 and I never had ever sexual intercourse because it is against our traditions here. A girl is not allowed until she is married. I never ever masturbated using machines or finger....

How can I trust that someone else will like my body when I hate it so much?

porte
asks:
I am 15 years old and about 5'10 and weigh more than 200lbs. I am currently in a long distance relationship and have been for almost 11 months. See, the thing is, I know I'm pretty, but I hate my body. The only thing that I like about it is my boobs. I am very self-conscious about it and I can't seem to lose weight. My boyfriend and I share everything together....

I don't feel safe with him: how can I change my feelings?

Becca
asks:
I'm in my late teens and have been dating my first boyfriend for one and a half years. Early on in the relationship he broke my trust and later on has done a few things that have made me really uncomfortable: touching me where I've told him not to before, being very rough, and the worst, making a negative comment about my body....

Sex is ... Irritating?

Anonymous
asks:
I have been sexually active for about three years now and have always had a problem with irritation after sex. I have recurring urinary tract infections which are now under control with medication, so I always assumed that the irritation was just the beginning of the infections....

How can I help my trans partner with a medical transition?

myself5
asks:
Okay, so I'm a female high school junior. There's this girl (sweet, geeky, smart, funny, the works) that I may soon be starting a sexual relationship with. She's trans and just started taking hormones. Currently she's male, but eventually, her "outie" will become an "innie," so to speak....

Pornography, Strip Clubs & Other Feminist Relationship Quandaries

sylviaplath
asks:
I could really use some help on this issue. I am a feminist, and pride myself on being open-minded and trying to keep my insecurities in check. I have been with my boyfriend for years, and we have lived together for 2. Within the past few months I have been looking at his computer and seeing that he watches pornography. While I do try to understand why, I cannot help but feel hurt....

I'm bisexual, so why don't I feel exactly the same about men and women?

nathanielthegreat
asks:
I'm 17, male, and have considered myself bisexual for 2 years now. I find myself emotionally attracted to women and sexually attracted to men. I like women in a certain way, I like to be in relationships with them. I see myself having kids, many in fact. But I'm not feeling sexually attracted to them, except for a few but can't find myself to have sex with them....

Did rape ruin my vagina forever?

Adrienne7777
asks:
I was raped about seven months ago and my vagina hasn't felt the same ever since: it has felt more open. My boyfriend and I just started having sex about a month ago. I asked him if I felt loose, because ever since the incident I haven't felt good about my vagina. He said that I am definitely not tight. I looked at my vagina with a mirror and noticed that the opening isn't completely closed....

Why is one group of women so different than another when it comes to interest in sex?

P1990
asks:
I am a 19-year old male, and all the time I hear or read things about females that age or even younger getting into sex, including right here on Scarleteen. But just about every female around my age that I know has little to no interest in sex. What is it that makes these groups of people so different? I'm worried I might not find any partners that are interested in it....

How do I tell my boyfriend I don't think he's ready for sex yet?

erohwaremac
asks:
My boyfriend and I have been going out for over five months now. In an emotional sense, we're a perfect couple. We love and respect each other, and get along incredibly. However, I am his first real girlfriend. I'm only the third girl he's ever kissed and done other things with. We "fool around" such as we make out, he feels me up and fingers me, and I go down on him, etc....

What's riskier?

Cayannagirl
asks:
My Fiance and I have been having sexually active for about a year now, but we don't live together so we don't get to have sex that often, usually only on weekends if we're lucky and get my house to ourselves....

How well will condoms really work?

Lary2211
asks:
I'm 19 years old. My boyfriend and I want to have sex. He is not a virgin, but I am. The only thing that I'm scared of is getting pregnant. We will use condoms for sure and as my boyfriend has had intercourse before, I'm assuming he knows how to use them. How effective can the condom be to prevent me from getting pregnant since I will be having sex for the first time?...

Feeling lost in a long-distance relationship

aroplane
asks:
I have been in a long distance relationship for a year now. We are in love, but he is a year older than me and is going to college this year. We decided a long time ago that breaking up would be the best option in order to avoid one of us cheating or having to break up on bad terms later on. The goal is to preserve our friendship....

This is what sexual incompatibility looks like.

haiguyz
asks:
My partner seems to pick and choose when she wants to fool around with me. Whenever I want to do anything, she doesn't, and if I get her to do anything, she complains the whole way through. When she gives me head, if I suggest things to do, she gives me an evil look, and tells me to shut up, like she's being humiliated....