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If i didn't have it, and he didn't have it, where did this STI come from?!

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Kayla asks:

My question is, I was tested for Gonnerhea and Chlamydia at the end of April of 08 and I was negative. I just got another test done when I was refilling my birth control three months later and came out positive. I know I surely have been faithful, and so has my partner, but we can't understand where it would have come from between the last test and this test. We've had intercourse since November of 07, and I was checked twice being negative. I know for a fact there aren't any faith issues, could I have had it without it being detected the first time? Please help! He's of course thinking I'm cheating. Blaah.

Hollie replies:

Hi Kayla,

While you can be sure that YOU have been faithful, there is no absolute way you can know that your partner has been faithful.

Has your partner been tested for gonorrhea or chlamydia in the past? If not, there is no way for you to know that he didn't have it when you started dating. If your tests were negative in April and positive now, it would seem that something/someone has gone astray since then. It is highly unlikely you would've gotten two negative results if you were infact positive.

You'll need antibiotics and testing done later on to make sure the infection is gone (your doctor should've discussed this with you). Your partner also needs to be tested now, and you need to either abstain from any sexual activity with anyone, or be using condoms for ALL genital contact. If your partner refuses to be tested, i'd be extremely suspicious that a) he has no concern for his own health or yours and b) perhaps he does have something to hide. Ending this relationship in that case would be a no-brainer for me.

written 09 Jul 2008 . updated 10 Jul 2008

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